The Raven in the Night

broken

i feel so broken,
there's something wrong with the system inside me.

i don't know whether im truly depressed,
because,
i can smile,
i can laugh,
the air in the room was so freeing;
but later at the darkest night,
i cry,
i cry,
i cry,
crying until my eyes becoming numb to see anything at all.

i thought i was getting better,
i really thought that,
but turns out it was only a fallacy,
cause' right now,
im in my bed,
trying to decode,
what is wrong with me?
what did i do to deserve this never-ending pain?
why am i like this?