Start Over

Twelve

⚠️ HEAVY Trigger warning ⚠️
- Sexual assault
- Child abuse

June 30th, Thursday 2021
4:30 pm
Blue Ivy Knowles

"Are you mad at me?" I ask Nydia as I play with her hair while she lays in my lap

"I just wish you didn't tell.." she replies

"I'm sorry I had to tell. I couldn't just sit by and watch you get hurt, you're my best friend and.. I love you so much." I stutter as I start to silently cry

I don't want Nydia to be upset with me she's my only friend and I love her so much. She's my favorite person ever behind my family.

"Please don't be upset with me." I whisper while tears fall from eyes

"I'm not upset with you Blue.." She tells me then she sits up so she's facing me

She turns towards me and gently rests her hands on each side of my face so I'm staring at her. I begin to cry more, out of fear. I'm terrified of losing her, she's my best friend and I don't want this to end our friendship. I was just trying to help and I didn't know what else to do except for tell my mom. I shouldn't be crying but I'm jus really sensitive and I can't help it.

"I'm not upset okay?" She says again as she wipes away my tears with her thumb

"Okay.." I whisper

"You're my best friend and I know you were trying to help." She tells me

"I was trying to help, I promise. I didn't know what else to do and I'm really sorry." I frantically try to explain to her but she quickly cuts me off

"I know Blue." She replies before pulling me into a tight hug

"Thank you." She whispers in my ear making me ease up a bit

"I'm sorry I shouldn't be crying this isn't about me, this is about you." I reply as I quickly wipe my tears

"This is about you too Blue Blue." She tells me

"Can we do something fun now? I don't like this depressing bullshit." She adds on

"Yes, anything you want Ny." I respond as I wipe my tears away

"Okay let's do it." She tells me as she hops out of the bed

Nydia is such a light to the world, even when she's upset she always stays positive. She pulls her phone out then she props it up on the nightstand.

"What are you doing Ny?" I ask her

"Let's go live on Instagram." She tells me

"Live?" I question

"Yeah come on." She replies as she motions me towards her

She sits down on the rocking chair. I look around for another chair but I can't find one.

"There are no chairs." I tell her

She scoots over in the rocking chair giving me a spot to sit.

"Come on." She responds then I sit in the chair next to her