BLACKBIRD IN THE SKY (Jax Teller)♡♡♡

DARKNESS COMES TO LIGHT

Jax ran his fingers through his hair, As Raven explained her reasons for going Nomad, She didn't mention Clay's involvement, she didn't feel that would do anybody any good. They sat beside the gravesides of their loved ones for most of the night while Raven let her guts spill out. She tried to kill herself. He didn't speak he didn't have to, she could tell by the slump of his shoulders he had taken all she had said in. Jax finally looked at her. His eyes roamed her face, he could see the toll this had been taking on her, living with the shame of what she tried to do. What he caused her to do. She stared at him, and again he ran his hand through his hair. He needed a trim. She saw the deep lines on his forehead as his brows farrowed. He reached out for her hand and his words began in her ears like a blur until they hit her heart.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." The sound of a sob echoed from his throat. "It's all my fault. I did this."

Her dark eyebrow raised. Her mouth parted. This was not the reaction she was expecting. She wasn't sure if she could deal with this reaction. As Jax pulled her into his lap and held her close her mind reeled as he repeated how sorry he was that he had done this to her, How he had caused her so much pain. Raven quickly bowed her head and touched her forehead to his. Looking him deep into his ocean-blue eyes, She felt his grip loosen on her as he pushed her gently away, and stood up. She looked up as she pulled herself up. Her heart raced as she looked at him. He was utterly still. His face pale, she tried to touch his hand but he moved away.

"Jacks-" He shook his head and took a step back from her.

"I'm sorry, I can't do this. You should get back on the road with Happy and Ink. You don't belong here...Not anymore." Raven took a shuddering breath. "Jax, please. Don't do this." She took a step towards him. "I Lov-" Jax cut her off as he pushed her hands away.

"No! I...I'm done. He sighed. "You have been trying to tell me since you came back to town. You were right, we've done our dance. I think we should move on with our lives. You can always see Abel, I will never stop you from being around my son. But we can't keep hurting each other Ray. It will kill us, Christ it did nearly kill you." She closed her eyes as he ran the pad of his thumb across her cheek. "Bye Ray." She watched as the reaper on his back walked back to his bike, Raven's shoulders shook He walked away. Raven let out a sob and fell to her knees, her hands came to her face as she wailed. Her body shook. All these years she had been alone, away from her family. For Jax. For him not to have the pain of knowing that she was weak. But it was all for nothing.

Jax had been riding for what felt like an eternity. As the sun began to rise and cast its warm glow through the towering redwood trees, Jax finally came to a stop. He dismounted his bike and made his way down to the peaceful stream, where the water was still and calm. But as he looked out at the serene scene before him, he couldn't hold back the tears any longer. His body shook with the weight of his grief, and he knew that he could never forgive himself for what Raven had done. The realization of what he needed to do was crushing him. He collapsed onto the grass, feeling the weight of his decision settling in twisting the reaper ring on his left hand his mind went to the day Raven had slipped on his finger, and he smiled at the memory of being surprised she had not chosen a traditional wedding ring for him.

He knew that he had to be the husband that Raven deserved, even if it meant letting her go. He would go to Lowen and have her draw up the divorce papers so that Raven could be free from the burden of their history. It was a difficult decision, but Jax knew that it was the right thing to do. He had to do it. He had to push Raven away. It was the only way he could ensure that he would never bring her down again. Sure, it hurt her deeply when he left her alone at their daughter's resting place. But at that moment, he had an epiphany. He realized that Raven deserved to move on and be happy. And from what he had seen, she seemed to be enjoying her time with the patch member at Jury's. He knew that she could have a life with him, and he wanted nothing more than for her to be happy.