The Lonely King (Book 1 of the Shadows, Roses and Ice Trilogy)

Chapter Twenty-Three

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Dante's POV

The castle was drastically quieter without her. It was as if she had become the life force of this place and when she left, she took it with her. There was no music, no sound of laughter, even the color of the kingdom grew dull in her absence. I felt empty, like all the love I poured over her dissolved into her, and with her gone, it did not replenish itself.

Cold and alone, I sat on my settee, watching the flames in the fireplace dance. The night around me was silent, giving me no solace. I opened up the balcony doors to hear something other than my soundless room, but the kingdom outside had grown still, noiseless too like it was preparing for the inevitable end.

Sighing, I ran a hand threw my hair and took another drink of the whiskey in my glass. The burning liquid felt like fire rolling down my throat. It was the closest thing to the igniting touch of Amabelle that I could get, and yet, it was not enough to chase the choking sorrow away.

Frustrated tears brimmed in my eyes, but I blinked them away and rubbed my face. It felt like a dagger had been lodged into my chest cavity, and the longer she was away, the further the dagger was wedged. It had been the hardest thing I had ever done to let her walk away. My wolf was in the worst pain of his life because of it.

She had left me in ruin.

It wasn't her fault, it was my own. From the beginning, I was doomed, I knew that. I was doomed to fall for her, and she inevitably was not able to love me the same way I loved her. I loved her in the most sacrificial way possible, that I would lay down my life for hers. If she was trapped millions of miles away, I would find a way to rescue her, no matter if it killed me in the process. I wasn't even sure if Amabelle would ever be able to comprehend how big my love for her was.

When you spend half a century waiting for your soulmate, you learn a lot of things. One being that if you do find your soulmate, you don't waste time asking the what-ifs. The what-ifs won't matter once you find them, because you realize your soulmate will be the answer to your what-ifs every time.

But Amabelle was young, so she had a lot to learn.

I understood that.

Regardless, she was wise beyond her years, perhaps wiser than me. If I had been gentler, and smarter in the beginning, maybe I wouldn't have taught her to be cautious with me. With everyone and everything else, she had thrown caution to the wind.

But with me, when her beautiful, captivating brown eyes met mine, and she admitted that she had fallen for me, I saw the most raw, cutting truth.

I saw hesitancy.

Closing my eyes, I felt a pang of agony as her memory blew through me like a wild storm. That was always how it had been. My love for Amabelle was as vast as an endless sea, and every time she was around me, the waves turned to tsunami size. They rolled in with whipping winds and pounding rain.

Amabelle was not my sunshine, instead, she was the hurricane consuming me from the inside out. A single smile could capsize a ship, and a touch could destroy a lighthouse. It was devastatingly powerful, and I knew that if she never returned, I would still be haunted by her.

Finishing my drink, I launched the glass into the fireplace. My chest heaved as I watched the glass shatter into a dozen pieces and begin to melt with the roaring fire. Swallowing, I tried to settle the rising anger in my heart, but it was no use.

You let her go, my wolf growled venomously, over his despair and moving on to the only other emotion available; self-loathing.

"Dante, don't lose hope," I heard Xavier's voice by my doorway.