The 1 Rule - haobin

mixed signs

We walk back into the cafeteria, and Ricky's eyes seem to be less puffy. The cafeteria seems as its normal, but I feel weird. I don't know if it is because I've never seen Ricky cry so violently and I don't really know how to react, or because I'm holding myself back to tell Ricky about the possibility of the truth.

Gyuvin doesn't like Ricky. I'm sure of it now. I think that I only thought that he liked him because he teased Ricky all the time. I thought it was some sense of affection, and it probably was, just not in that way.

Ricky walks away from me after giving me a slight smile and walking up to Yujin's table. Meanwhile, I walk back to our table, where everyone but Matthew and Jiwoong are. I look at Gyuvin and Taerae and see them chatting amicably, physical touch being very present. Gyuvin is grabbing at Taerae's arm while laughing, and Taerae has his hands over the other's. I sigh and sit down next to Cho, and start with my food.

"Hey, is Ricky ok?" I hear Cho whisper to me. I don't look at her but I nod nevertheless

"Yeah, why wouldn't he be?" I ask. I see Cho shrug from the side of my eyes. She probably already knows, but I'm not bound to speak about my friend's moment of vulnerability that he trusted me with. 

It's never been this bad, but I can't do anything about it. I believe him. I believe that Ricky loves him, and I will not judge. A few years ago, a friend of mine had said that they loved some guy. I was almost sure that she really didn't, but that she did like him a lot. But something about the pain in Ricky's eyes and the way he speaks of the boy, made me believe him. The worst part is that I can't do anything to cure the pain and jealousy that is placed within my best friend.

<flashback>

"I love him," says Ricky, voice breaking. He suddenly starts to weep again, leaning against me, burying his face in his hands and knees. I look at him with surprise. 

Is it possible? Most of all, it's tragic

"Ricky... look at me," I say. Ricky hesitatingly looks up at me, and I see how puffy his eyes seem, red with salty tears. I wipe some off of his cheeks and give him a smile, trying not to look pitiful

"Ricky, are you sure that you... love him?" I ask. Ricky nods, his tears slowly stopping flowing down his cheeks. 

"I'm sure, Hanbin. I've been sure for two years now" he says. I gasp in a not-so-subtle way

"You've liked him for two years?" I ask, surprised

"No... I noticed that I loved him two years ago, but I've actually liked him for a lot more than that" he says. I keep quiet, not knowing what to say.

This is horrible, simply devastating. 

"And sometimes, I think that he also likes me. But ever since Taerae started hanging out with us, I'm not so sure anymore" he continues, fidgeting with his hands. I continue to stay quiet, being absolutely lost in this situation, almost unable to process everything

"Did you know that I loved him?" my friend asks

"No. I thought you liked him, and I even thought you both were dating a few weeks ago. But I never thought that you loved him

"Well, I did. I do, still" he responds "I don't know, it's just so frustrating seeing him sometimes"

"Who? Gyuvin or Taerae?" 

"Both. I hate how Gyuvin is just so capable of making me feel hurt in a matter of seconds while flirting with Taerae. But at the same time, I understand that it's not his fault. It's not like we're a couple or anything, so he's allowed to like anyone that he pleases. And as for Taerae, I hate how he's the one that causes Gyuvin to turn his attention away from me" he says, taking deep breaths while he speaks

"Taerae isn't a bad person, you know"

"I know. I know. But sometimes I wish he was, so that would stop Gyuvin from liking him"

<end of flashback>

"Hanbin, where did Ricky go?" I hear someone say. I snap out of my thoughts and look up from my food toward Gyuvin

"Oh, he just went to talk to Yujin," I say, trying to sound as natural as possible. Gyuvin nods and turns his head around to look at where Ricky and Yujin are. I see Ricky looking over at Yujin's phone while the younger shows him something. Ricky suddenly erupts in fits of laughter, while Yujin laughs along with him.

"Since when were they that close?" Cho asks me in a whisper

"They aren't," Gyuvin says, clearly having heard Cho. Is what I hear... jealousy?

"How do you know?" I ask the boy across me, feeling slightly annoyed. I won't lie that I'm not sort of angry at him for giving Ricky mixed signs and making the boy feel horrible

"I just do" he answers, shrugging

"Well, they are sort of close. They hang out after school sometimes" I say, looking at Gyuvin intently. He doesn't flinch and doesn't react in any abnormal way. He just opens his mouth in understatement and nods, then turns around to continue talking to Taerae.

Now Ricky isn't the only one who is confused, because so am I.

♡♡♡

I'm so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so SOOOOOOO sorryyyyyyyy!!!!!! I know I haven't uploaded in like a month and I'm so sorry for that. Y'all really don't know how sorry I feel :(

I'm not trying to give excuses but motivation has been really at its lowest and I've seriously been so busy with everything, including studying and family stuff. I hope y'all understand and I'll make sure to upload more often!

Anyways, do you guys think that Gyuvin likes Ricky or not? Or does he like Taerae?

ALSO, HELLO??????? ZB1 NEW COMEBACK??????? bro istg I was so surprised when I saw the spoiler film

Anyways, lets make sure to support the group at our fullest and give them all our love! <3

(stream 'fever' by Enhypen)