I Hate You, I Love You

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****I can't explain it. I love the pain.****

Your heart is racing as you dial Eddie's number again and again only to be ignored each time.

I can't believe he would do this. How could he do this?

"Answer your fucking phone." you hiss, leaving yet another voicemail. You press down on the gas as you fly down the road heading towards his apartment.

You go to ring him again when your phone lights up and you see Chloe's name pop up on the screen. You answer quickly, the call transferring to the Bluetooth in your car.

"I'm gonna kill him." you declare blankly as you speed up even more.

"Need backup?"

"No. I think I need to handle this alone." you sigh deeply as you press the gas even harder.

"You know I'm here if you need me. If you go down, we go down together." Chloe promises as you take a sharp left turn.

"I can't believe he would do this.." you whisper, doing your best to fight back the tears.

It doesn't make sense. I know I didn't come home but he's never hurt me like this before.

"Are you sure it was Munson? Doesn't really seem like his thing.. he's never liked sharing you and then all of a sudden he decides to share you with the entire world?" Her voice crackles through the car speakers.

"It couldn't have been anyone else, Chlo. He's the only one who has that... video."

"You look really hot in it, if that helps.." Chloe jokes, her tone is soft as she tries to make you feel better.

A small smile appears on your lips as you roll your eyes. "You watched it?"

"Just a little.. I had to know what we were dealing with.. also.. I knew you said he was big, but fuck Nova... that thing scares me." Chloe shudders and you can only imagine her face, making you smile even wider.

"Chloe.. all dicks scare you." you chuckle as you make another turn.

Almost there.

"Fair," she agrees. "But that one needs a warning sign... like seriously.." she babbles on.

"Hey, I'm pulling up.. I'll call you soon." you explain, your heart is pounding intensely in your chest as you park along the sidewalk.

"Babe? Do me a favor and steer clear of social media for now.." Chloe suggests gently.

"How bad is it?"

"Just promise me. No socials until you come see me." she emphasizes. Fuck.

"Okay, promise."

"Love youuu." Chloe sings and you return the sentiment before shutting off the car.

Here we go.

You make your way into Eddie's building, security letting you pass without any issues. You take a deep breath as you knock on his door.

No answer.

You knock louder. "Eddie, I'm gonna kill you if you don't open this goddamn door!" you shout and then you hear a laugh from behind you.

"He's not here. Everything okay?" Eddie's manager is looking at you carefully as you spin around.

"No, Jimmy. Everything isn't okay.. can you let me in? I'll just wait for him.." you try. You can see Jimmy weighing his options.

"Please. I need to see him." you utter, finally allowing the tears of frustration you've been holding back to flow freely.

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