Ataraxia (SaeranxReader)

Tea

-Chapter 6: Tea-

"The world's heaviest wreckage is the disappointments that a person is under." 

𖤓

We were back to being silent and strangers again. 

Saeran wasn't much of a talker anyway, so I guess the moment we were listening to music together and asking me questions was just an exception. Because after the music was over, his old cold gaze returned and he focused directly on his work. I just stood there in confusion. 

Okay, I didn't expect that we would suddenly fall in love and kiss each other miraculously, but I couldn't understand how he suddenly closed his doors just as he opened himself to me.

The next week has been boring for me. During the week, he didn't have much of a conversation with me other than teaching me about my assistant job. I understand he was a hacker and was working for this cult, Mint Eye. He was protecting the security system with the codes he wrote, collecting information on the internet, and looking for new members to the cult. As he said, he was responsible for most things, indeed the Savior must have trusted him. 

When the believers in the cult saw him, they were constantly bowing and obeying him no matter how angry he was. There was no one who bullied or disrespected me. I was not tortured as I expected. Most of those robed people seemed to have been drugged anyway.

During the week, Savior called me into her room twice. When I looked at Saeran for confirmation, he just shrugged and went about his business. Apparently, Savior was looking for a tea time friend or something because she hosted me very well in her room on both visits that week. As if this wasn't a cult and I wasn't imprisoned here. Those two days when I went to her room for a cup or two of hot tea, I didn't feel like a prisoner. 

Among our conversations, I learned that her name is Rika and that she has been ruling this 'Paradise' (I mean, I know it is a cult, but she calls it Paradise) for about 10 years. Saeran had been with her from the very beginning and she was caring for him like a mother, taking him under her wing.

I was examining the luxurious room we were in as I flipped a sugar cookie between my fingers. It wasn't as luxurious as the throne room I saw when I was first brought to Mint Eye, but I was sure it was one of the most luxurious rooms in the sect. It was clear that Rika had quite a talent for interior design.

The moment I realized the thought of getting my teeth into the cookie came to life, Rika turned her attention to me. "You seem to like sweets. Saeran is also fond of sweets." I hugged the porcelain teacup in front of me while coughing desperately so that the crumbs in my throat wouldn't choke me. 

Fortunately, Rika ignored my panic and took a sip from her own cup. "He used to make me these sugar cookies all the time. Now…I think he's grown up so he gave up the cute stuff. He was calmer, now he's aggressive and…angry."

I tried picturing Saeran baking cookies in a large kitchen. I imagined how his mint green eyes focused on shaping the cookies, how his long fingers moved as he made patterns from sugar paste. A calmer Saeran. Not like fire, but water. I wonder if those mint green eyes were this dark back then, or did they once glow?

"Well, as long as he stays true to our holy cause, the rest is none of my business." She shrugged as if she didn't care.

I didn't know why, but somehow I cared. Was he once happy? What was Saeran like when his soul wasn't that dark, when he was just a kid who enjoyed candies and listening to music? Was he this quiet again, or did his mint green eyes sparkle as he excitedly said something?