The Scenic Route

Chapter 2

"I think I'd rather sell an organ for gas money."

"I wish I could give you guys some," Kenny says. He picks up the pricing machine again, angrily slapping $9.99 on a Jurassic Park DVD. "It's just these fucking car repairs, and I need the car for work -"

"Dude, no, it's totally fine," Stan says. He squeezes Kenny's shoulder. "And I think Cartman would be willing to help out. He'll probably be really flattered to be asked."

"Yeah, and we'll pay the price for six days," Kyle says. He groans. "Do you think there's any way we could persuade Butters to go against his parents?"

"If he does they won't pay for his college," Kenny says.

"Yeah, we'd better not fuck with that whole situation," Stan says. "Let's just ask Cartman at the party tonight and see what happens. You're coming, right?" he says to Kenny, who nods. He's listless again, the way he looked before he saw them walking over.

"Maybe it could work with Cartman," Kyle says. He doesn't want to crush Kenny, or his own dreams of being out on the open road with Stan, under a big sky. "Maybe he'd just sleep a lot."

"Yeah," Stan says. Kenny scoffs.

"Why do they do this to him?" he says.

"Who?" Kyle asks.

"Butters' parents. Fuck. Pisses me off." He's mumbling now, pricing DVDs without really looking at them. Kyle and Stan exchange another look. Before Kenny's father left, Kenny had the worst home life in South Park, and after he was gone Butters contended for the title, though he's always had plenty to eat and never had to clean up his parents' puke from the kitchen floor, so far as Kyle knows. Still, there's something very insidious about Butters' parents particular brand of control. Kenny once said that he thought that Butters' father probably hit him, too, but wouldn't answer Kyle when he asked why.

They leave Kenny in a bad mood, without having learned how he feels about the Cartman plan. Stan buys a cherry slushie from the concession counter at the Wall-Mart, and they take turns sipping from it as they head toward his car.

"Want to hang out before the party?" Stan asks. Kyle nods and swipes the slushie. He feels stupidly victorious, glad that Stan isn't spending these last daylight hours with Wendy. The talk must have been postponed indefinitely. That would fit their general dating style. Wendy is a great orator and Stan is one of the most open people Kyle has ever known, but they revert to elementary school note passing when it comes to discussing their relationship.

They spend the rest of the sweltering afternoon in Stan's room, shades drawn and the floor fan pointed at the bed, where they've stretched out to watch old kung fu movies on Stan's laptop. Stan thinks they're hilarious, and Kyle is usually bored by them, but he doesn't mind watching them like this, the laptop resting on Stan's stomach, rising and falling with his breath.

"Should we call Cartman?" Stan asks at one point. Kyle blinks drowsily at the laptop screen, close to falling asleep.

"No," he says. "Let's wait until the last possible moment. Maybe some miracle will happen."

"Like what, dude? My dad's gonna run in here and announce that he won the lottery?"

"Yeah, and that he spent the winnings on a Coors Light refinery," Kyle says. Stan laughs and punches his shoulder.

"I can't believe we're gonna be free of our parents," he says.

"Yeah." It doesn't feel like it will really count, not if they're living on opposite coasts.