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The image of the bad memory appear in my mind again. Jake is already walking ahead but stop when he realize that I didn't follow him. He frustratedly turn to his back, about to say something but stop when he saw my condition.
My body shivered, cold sweats trickled down my forehead, it's hard to breath as if there's a heavy burden pressing on my chest. I covered my ears, trying to block away the sound that appear in my mind as my legs weaken. My legs gave up on supporting my body and I almost fall to the ground before a hand hold mine to prevent my body from falling.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Jake asked in a low voice.
I want to reply him but my voice won't come out. He sigh before he dragged me away from the swing ride. We're sitting on the bench as I used this time to calm myself. Jake is sitting beside me, leaving some space between us as he's crossing his arms.
"You look hyper earlier but when I suggested to ride the swing ride, you suddenly became like this. What's wrong?" Jake suddenly asked after we stayed silent for a moment.
I went didn't say a word for a while, contemplating to tell him. "... I just had a bad memory about that ride."
"Did an accident happened or something?"
Bullseyes.
I look at him in horror and confusion. He raised his eyebrows. "I heard what you asked to the roller coaster staff. You're really worried about the safety of the ride so I assume that something like an accident happened before."
He have that idea just based on those information? He must be really observant with his surroundings.
Should I tell him? Maybe I should so the next time we won't have a date at theme park anymore. But it's not like he cares right? What if after I tell him, he'll use this to blackmail me or torture me or something.
"If you don't want to tell me then fine. It's not like I care for you. I just felt weird that you suddenly react like that."
Of course he won't care for me. Eventhough we're tied in a forced connection, we're still strangers. Doesn't care enough about each other. I clicked my tongue as silence engulfed us again.
"... When I was a kid, I witnessed an accident at the swing ride." I was surprised at myself for telling him this story. I don't know why, maybe I just want to lessen the tension between us. I already have enough stress today, I don't need more.
Jake didn't reply and just listen. "There's a man, maybe in his thirties, got thrown away from the ride. He fell from it and crack his head open, died instantly. He fell right in front of me and I saw his body clearly. That image haunted me." As I tell this story, I can hear everyone at that time screaming and crying. I resisted myself from covering my ears.
"So that's why I don't like theme park. It reminded me of that incident and also..." Also the day where my mom left me alone at the theme park. I cut my own words as I almost tell him everything. He doesn't need to know that, it's not like he cares.
