You Just Love To Hate Me || Ricky 'Horror' Olson (EDITING)

Chapter 18: Pretty Little Lady With The Swollen Eyes

Song for this chapter: When You Can't Sleep At Night- Of Mice & Men

Vamp's POV

"Are you ready to go?" Ricky asked as he draped my coat on my shoulders.

I looked around at all of my intoxicated friends and family and nodded. I know that the wake is supposed to be a time to let loose and to forget, but I'm just not feeling it I don't want to do anything and I don't want to get drunk because it feels disrespectful to my child.

Ricky placed his hand in mine tightly and pulled me up. I held his hand tighter and we were about to leave when I held up a finger, motioning for him to hold on. I let go of his hand and rushed up to my mum and dad. My dad was very drunk, but my mum had only had a glass of wine.

I hugged him quickly and then hugged her. She hugged me back just as tight and kissed my cheek. "We must do something soon and have a nice cup of tea and a catch up okay?" My mum smiled.

"Yeah mumma I'll ring you," I smiled.

"Okay dear have a nice rest okay?"

"I will mum you too and good luck getting mister home," I chuckled.

"I'll need it," She sighed and hugged me quickly one more time before letting me go and turning back to my dad, shaking her head slightly at him.

I walked back over to Ricky who had his arm outstretched towards me. I took his hand and we walked out of the door, down the stairs and out to the car where we called a taxi, jumped in and drove home.

We walked into the house and it was eerily quiet, I know everyone's out, but it has the creepy feeling around it that you get when you walk into a house at night and the curtains are open so it's lit only by moonlight.

"I want to make you forget," Ricky murmured.

"I have remember," I joked.

"No I want to take your mind off of everything that's happened, I want you to be happy again. I want you to be happy the way you were before." He explained.

"I am happy with you," I whispered.

"It doesn't seem like it," He sighed.

"Well I am," I told him and kissed his jaw. "Can I tell you something?" I asked with an excited glimpse in my eye.

"You can tell me anything," He promised, looking me deep in the eyes.

"I wrote a song a little while ago."

"Really?" He asked excitedly. I nodded slowly. "Can I hear it?" He asked. I shook my head. "Why?" He pouted.

"It's awful," I laughed.

"I can help you with it." He offered.

"Okay," I sighed.

I walked upstairs and Ricky followed me. I opened the door to his room and he handed me his black acoustic. I smiled gratefully and sat on the bed in a cross legged fashion. I took a deep breath and looked at him nervously. He gave me an encouraging smile and placed his hand on my knee. I placed my hands on the chords and started to strum.

"I drove by all the places we used to hand out getting wasted. I thought about our last kiss, how it felt, the way you tasted, and even though your friends tell me you're doing fine, are you somewhere feeling lonely even though she's right beside you? When she says those words that hurt you do you need the ones I wrote you? Sometimes I start to wonder was it just a lie? If what we had was real how could you be fine? 'Cause I'm not fine at all." I sang. That bits about Jack and how he basically threw us away.

I looked up at Ricky and he had a massive smile on his face. "That's amazing! He exclaimed. "Is that it?" He asked. I shook my head. "Keep going then," He laughed and shook my knee a bit with his hand.

"Okay," I sighed and started strumming again. "I remember the day you told me you were leaving. I remember the makeup running down your face and the dreams you left behind, you didn't need them. Like every single wish we ever made." That bits about how abandoned Chris made me feel when he left me. I wrote that a while ago it just fit in this song. "I wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid little things. Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you and the memories I never can escape. 'Cause I'm not fine at all." That bit's about Jack again because I remember our stupid relationship that was probably a joke to him yet I don't remember my life before that and I don't remember the one that's been here for me through everything and has loved me unconditionally.

"The pictures that you sent me they're still living in my phone. I'll admit I like to see them I'll admit I feel alone." I wrote that bit about Ricky. I see all of the pictures we took before my severe amnesia took over my life and it kills me, but it also reminds me I had a life before Jack, I didn't waste my whole life on him. "And all my friends keep asking why I'm not around. It hurts to know you're happy, yeah, it hurts that you moved on. It's hard to hear your name when I haven't seen you in so long. It's like we never happened was it just a lie? If what we had was real how could you be fine? 'Cause I'm not fine at all."

I repeated the chorus about Chris again then stopped before singing the next bit. "This bit I wrote when I was still heartbroken so don't take it to mean something because honestly it doesn't." I told Ricky who nodded. "If today I woke up with you right beside me, like all of this was just some twisted dream, I'd hold you closer than I ever did before and you'd never slip away and you'd never hear me say." I sang the chorus again and sang the last bit quietly, "'Cause I'm not fine at all. No I'm really not fine at all. Tell me this is just a dream 'cause I'm really not fine at all."

"That was good," He smiled, but his smile was empty.

"What's wrong?"

"Was that song about Jack or me?" He asked.

"Both," I mumbled.

"Are you over Jack?" He asked.

"Yes," I told him. He shook his head as if he didn't believe me. I took his hands in mine and forced him to look at me. "Ricky I am! Please believe me because I am. I have you back and I don't want anyone else. I wrote that song ages ago. Please don't go," I begged as tears slid down my face.

Ricky sighed for a moment before hugging me tightly. "Okay I'm sorry for doubting you. I promised to never leave and I'll keep that promise." He mumbled and kissed my jaw. "You're so beautiful," He whispered in awe as he looked me up and down. I squirmed a bit, feeling slightly uncomfortable and vulnerable. "Don't." He ordered. "You're perfect." I blushed and looked down. He tilted my head back up and stared into my eyes before kissing my lips sweetly. He started kissing down my neck and stomach then worked his way back up to my lips where he kissed me softly again. "I love you so fucking much," He whispered.

I went to go get my pajamas on, but he pulled me back down. "You look beautiful I want you to stay like that," He ordered. I blushed and got under the covers with him and he pulled me as close as possible between us so my bare skin was pressed up against his stomach. "When you wake up I'll tell you another story if you want?" He offered.

"Okay," I mumbled sleepily, turned around so I was facing him and cuddled even closer into him. He kissed my forehead softly and I fell asleep with a smile on my face, something that's becoming quite common.