Fuckass... || ChiScara

Author's Note :)

So, I'm uploading this to give a little bit of a life update, and to address some comments I've been seeing. I don't know if they show publicly because when I look in the chapter's comments I can't see them, but I can see them in my notifications.

A few people have said some things along the lines of, "hurry up and update, I need this and my life is shit so give it to me." 

Whilst I appreciate the support and the fact that people enjoy my writing, I am a person too. A person with my own issues. It isn't just school that's been keeping me away and stopping me from focusing on writing this. This story never has, and never will be my top priority. I started writing this a long time ago, and since then, a lot has happened.

A few examples of what has happened are;
- My dog was put down without telling me because my dad claimed that I wouldn't care. (Going to his house gave me panic attacks, so I stopped going.)
- School being stressful (exams, important assignments, etc, I'm in my second last year there's a lot to do)
- Mental health issues (A lot of days where I just can't bring myself to do anything, let alone write)
- Lost a lot of people I thought were good friends (turns out they were using and manipulating me)
- Physical health (I have a lot of struggles which I will get to later in this)

I understand entirely that other people have things going on too, and it's good for them to have something that helps, but don't dump that on me. I'm just another kid attempting to struggle my way through life too. It's not my responsibility to keep everyone happy and stable, I don't need another thing to stress me out.

Whilst I say all of this, I do really care about all of you, I'm just not the right person to dump your mental stability on, find another support system of close friends, family, or adults in your life. People who are in the right state of mind to help you.

Now, moving on from that a little more

I love and appreciate those who have been supporting me so, so much. Those who have told me that it's okay that I take a long time to update. Those who still read this story often but don't pressure me to hurry up. I read all my comments every time they come in and I appreciate you silly goofy guys so much. You guys are the reason I still write this, I probably would've given up a year ago without you all. 

These amazing people are the majority, so I'm sorry about the stuff I wrote before, that's the minority, but I really needed to get it out there. I'm also going to use this chapter here to let you all know of my current plans and what is happening right now.

I'm going to try to get at least one chapter each month from now on, though I don't want to be pressured if I don't manage to. Any kind messages or reminders will be appreciated and help me get to it, but anything like what was mentioned earlier, I would like to avoid.

I do also have some ongoing struggles that may hinder me whilst I'm trying to reach this goal. In exactly one week, I'll be having an endoscopy + colonoscopy, thanks to a polyp (lump) that was found in my stomach not long ago from another endoscopy. I've been getting really nauseous and throwing up lots for the past two years and things are being done about it, but it's been causing me to get extremely anxious, which makes writing harder. I also have a few overdue assignments and art that I have a deadline for completing, so those will also be stopping me.

This is probably really messy, but thank you for reading, I appreciate all of you and all of the support I've received on this silly little story