For You

Motives Understood

The town of Cranray was so small that following the simple instructions, I arrived within minutes. On the outskirts of town, I made it to a small, beat-down, red bricked building. Taking one of the fifteen parking spots, my black Toyota was the only vehicle on site. Reading my five-part instructions over again and taking notice of the dimly lit Cranray Library sign, I concluded that I had in fact reached the right location.

      The growing darkness as the sun began to set, and lack of sign of human life, no home or other building in sight, did nothing to help my lack of enthusiasm towards fulfilling my granddad's wish. If not for the dim lights illuminated through the line of windows, I would have assumed it was closed. Warily pulling on the old wooden handle, I was almost surprised when the door creaked opened. Door slamming shut behind me; I stepped onto the blue carpet of the tiny building. There was only six computers and four rows of books. The library at Astha Falls Academy was twice as big as this one, and I genuinely thought the computers may have been older than me.

       Catching no initial sight of any other person, I feared I was alone until I caught sight of a small head behind the computer at the main desk. Stepping deeper into the room, I got a better look at the girl sat in the office chair. My heart dropped. If grandpa hadn't already been dead, I may have considered killing him. The man had done this by purpose, and I felt stupid for not catching on to his motives. Why else would he have been so persistent? I should have known better.

       Shooting Lexi another short glance, I turned my gaze towards the door as I contemplated going back on my steps and pretending I was never there. Despite my brief look, I noticed that already the brunette's cheeks had turned pink. White earbuds in her ears and eyes strained on the book in her lap, she pretended not to acknowledge my presence, but she clearly knew I was there. Biting my lip, I made way towards the nearest computer. It was too late to leave. If I left without doing any kind of work or borrowing a book she would know I was avoiding her, and I worried that she would get the wrong impression. How could she not?

     Taking notice of my decision to stay, Lexi finally looked up. She offered me a small smile and removed one ear bud, as if to show me that she could be approached.

      I returned the smile, relieved by the small gesture. I was starting to believe that Lexi wasn't annoyed with my presence but rather wary of any social interaction in general.

      After a long search on the computer, I remained clueless as to which book to choose. There were so many options. Always busy with sports and hanging out with friends, I didn't, previously, have much spare time to do things such as reading. I used to cheat and read the online book summary. I didn't even know what genre interested me.

     Momentarily giving up on my internet search, I decided to roam the few shelves of books, hoping something would stand out. It was difficult to focus on my task with Lexi nearby. Every minute spent on my homework was two minutes spent glancing her way.

      Cluelessly roaming the aisles, not sure which section to begin in, I couldn't help but sneak another glance at her. Paused by the history section, with no intention whatsoever on choosing one of the books in front of me, I watched her discreetly. Small smiled etched on her bright lips as she flipped through the pages of her worn out book, I couldn't help but notice the difference in her stance. Lost in the words she read; it was the first time I saw her visibly relaxed. Shoulders relieved of their usual tension, the habits of nervously chewing her bottom lip and bouncing her legs were no longer present. As she lifted her novel to turn to the next page, I leaned sideways, hoping to get a better look at the book's cover page. Just briefly catching sight of the author's name, I replanted my feet to the carpet with a disgruntled look on my face. Shakespeare. Shakespeare?! As if I needed another subject in which I would fail to impress her. I shot the book a second desperate glance, wishing its title might magically change. As if sensing a pair of eyes on her, Lexi reluctantly tore her focus away from the book.