Foolish One

back in new york

"I like that melody." Kace said as we sat on my apartment floor and messed with my guitars.

Kace kinda knows how to play guitar but not really. He tries and it's the thought that counts.

"But we were dancing, with our hands tied, hands tied," I strummed and sang quietly.

Kace watched me mess with the string. He picked up his black coffee and sipped it hot. He grimaced at the bitterness- but he swore he liked it that way. He looked so tired, it was cute.

I actually woke him up. I was messing around at the piano and accidentally played a little too hard. He came stumbling out of my bedroom and sat next to me on the piano bench.

My studio time is in three days. I have three songs done. However, they still need to be edited by actual writers and stuff.

I need 4 songs done. Which is causing me to panic. Kace is basically living with me. We've been together for about a month and a half. He's such an interesting person. Just everything about him is so beautiful and cool.

He's pretty cool if I do say so myself. Not as cool as me, but cool as fuck.

I haven't been on the internet in about a month. Not since I posted the video. I just haven't been interested. I haven't been out, The only person i've really spoken to is just Kace, Marilyn and my mom.

I have a lot of just all around rage. Sometimes I get too into the writing and I'll freak out, and Kace would sit with me and hold me like he did in London, and he would stroke my hair and kiss me, and everything calmed.

Speaking of London. I wrote a song about my experience in London. Maybe to give people my point of view of things, maybe to give myself a little closer.

London is Lonely (Holly Humberstone)

Started feelin' like I'm livin' in the upside down
I haven't seen you in forever and I don't know how
And I've been smokin' and stayin' out too late
But you know I've got good intentions, babe
Started feelin' like I see you in the rush hour crowd
Or when I catch you and a stranger in the underground
But something's missing, I got an empty space
And something's different when you leave my place
So I'll try not to say what I mean when I call you up
And I'll try not to think of the distances between us————-
And it's so good when we dance all night
And I swear that I'd be alright
But it's gettin' harder and harder to reach you
And London is lonely without you
So will you stay?
'Cause I'm oh-so sick of this place
Feelin' way too big
And nothing can hold me, can hold me like you do
London is lonely without you
Any minute now I swear I'm gonna lose my mind
So many people, it's so easy to get lost sometimes
And this winter is going on too long
Though it don't snow here, it stays pretty cold and I miss your warmth
So I'll try not to say what I mean when I call you up
And I'll try not to think of the distances between us
And it's so good when we dance all night
And I swear that I'd be alright
But it's gettin' harder and harder to reach you
And London is lonely without you
So will you stay?
'Cause I'm oh-so sick of this place
Feelin' way too big
And nothing can hold me, can hold me like you do
London is lonely, so lonely
I'm lonely without you
I'm lonely without you
God, I'm lonely without you
And it's so good when we dance all night
And I swear that I'd be alright
But it's gettin' harder and harder to reach you
And London is lonely without you
So will you stay?
'Cause I'm oh-so sick of this place
Feelin' way too big
And nothing can hold me can hold me like you do
London is lonely, so lonely
I'm lonely without you (I'm lonely without you)
I'm lonely without you (so lonely without you)
God, I'm lonely without you (so lonely without you)
London is lonely, so lonely
I'm lonely without you, mm
God, I'm lonely without you