No Matter What

The Graduates

Connor and I were nine weeks into our journey as parents. We wanted to visit the boys every day in the NICU, but with school and work, it was tough. I was able to get there a few times a week still, and so was Connor, in his new adaptive car that he could drive. It was an absolute lifesaver.

The boys were improving little by little, growing bigger and stronger. They still had a while to go, but as of today, we were looking at only a few more weeks. Hopefully. I couldn't wait to finally have them home.

"I'm so proud of you," Dad said to me as we pulled into my high school's parking lot.

"I know, Dad," I said.

"Your mom would be proud of you too."

"Well, obviously."

"I can't believe you're so grown up already," he said, shaking his head.

"Me either. I don't want to be an adult," I said.

"Well I hate to break it to you, but you can't go backwards. You just have to keep going straight ahead."

"I know," I said, opening the door. "Hey, thanks Dad. For everything."

"Thanks for being my daughter," he said. "Oh, and don't forget your cap!"

"Oh, right."

He handed me my graduation cap. Everyone else did really complex designs or put the logos of their college on it, but I chose something that was special to me. With the help of the NICU nurses, I had both of my boys' feet and handprints on my cap. They used red paint for Apollo and blue paint for Aries.

I flung my magenta void over my shoulder, put on my cap, and went over to the line of kids that were wrapped around the building. I saw the cluster of people and knew Connor was probably with them. I shuffled through everyone, and as I expected, he was in the middle.

"There's my baby momma!" he said, holding his arms out.

"Good morning, speech guy," I said, giving him a hug. "You sure you're ready?"

"I've been practicing all night."

"And the whole month," I said.

"Hey, there's literally thousands of people out there! Gotta do my best," he said.

A few minutes later, one of the school staff came to grab Connor. I was left with Chris and the rest of the posse, who were asking me about the boys. My social anxiety seemed to fade away whenever I thought about them. I loved them so much and never missed an opportunity to show them off.

I proudly showed them the pictures Connor and I took in the NICU last night. As much as we wanted the boys at our graduation, we knew it wasn't going to happen. Connor and I took pictures of us in the NICU, holding them in our cap and gowns.

We stood in line for a while after that, and the sun was beating down so hard that my gown started sticking to me. It didn't help that all of our gowns were black. I think that made our situation ten times worse.

After standing in the hot sun for what felt like forever, we finally got lined up in alphabetical order with the help of the school staff. We were moving on to the next phase of the day after that. They brought us onto the grass of the football field, where five-hundred chairs were lined up in rows.

I looked into the bleachers and saw the many, many Gomez siblings (the triplets had ten brothers and sisters. It was nuts). I tried to find Dad and the rest of my family, but there was blinding son and a zillion people up there. It was no use. I was hoping that Annie was okay. She was due in only three weeks and was probably dying in this heat.

Like everyone else, I started fanning myself out with my graduation cap. The principal, Mister Reiner, got on the stage once we were all seated, and when he was halfway through his speech, a beach ball flew over my head.

I heard that this happens every year, but I didn't think anyone from our grade would actually do it. One of them even came over to me, and I spiked it right over to the front row. The staff were scrambling to get them away from us, but it seemed like as soon as they got one, another would show up. I laughed at the thought of whoever this was having a stash of beach balls under their graduation robe.

Mister Reiner kept going with his speech, and the beach balls kept coming. The staff had their hands literally full of beach balls. There were five or six of them bouncing around the crowd now.

"And if those beach balls aren't gone in the next ten seconds, nobody is getting their diploma today!" Mister Reiner said.

Chris, myself, and the Gomez triplets next to me exchanged glances. Nobody thought he'd stop his speech. The balls suddenly stopped bouncing, and we were on the way with the rest of the ceremony.

"And for our speaker this year, please welcome Connor Midnight," Mister Reiner said.

Everyone clapped for Connor. I held my cap in front of my face to block out some of the sunlight. Connor adjusted the microphone and cleared his throat.

"First off, I'd like to thank the student body for voting to have me as the student speaker this year! So, sorry Gabby, it looks like the people are more interested in the wheelchair kid than the valedictorian," Connor said.

Gabby Gomez, who was sitting directly to my left, let out a few giggles. Her gold valedictorian sash was glimmering in the intense sunlight.

"I wanted to write a speech about our futures and college and how now we're all grown up, but that seemed just a little too sappy. Then I thought about writing something along the lines of 'never giving up' because I fell off the roof last year at prom and now I'm a paraplegic. But that also seemed kind of generic. And as I sat up late at night with my girlfriend Ayla, she said, 'what about the babies?' And I said, 'Yes. We have two of them,'"Connor said. The crowd laughed.

"I decided then that I wanted to talk about my two baby boys: Apollo and Aries. In one year I went from a regular teen on a football field, to a wheelchair, and then to finding out I was becoming a parent. At seventeen. And I'll be honest, I was a little freaked out. And when they told us it was twins, I was a little more freaked out. And then, when they told us they were rare twins that only had a fifty-percent chance of survival, my freakout meeter hit the roof.

"But together, Ayla and I had two little boys, born on April Fool's Day. Both survived, and both are still in the NICU. They've been fighting for their chance at life ever since they were born. Everything I do is for them. They keep me focused. They keep me strong. I think about how much I love them, and my girlfriend, and my family, and how I'm never alone.

"So here is my advice to you, my fellow graduates. Someone is always rooting for you. There is always someone who will believe in you, no matter what. So do your best in life, not just for yourself, but for everyone who cares about you. Now let's hand out some diplomas before we all melt out here!" Connor said.

Everyone cheered, and Connor even got a standing ovation. I was so proud of him. The speech was great, especially the end. We all just wanted to get our diplomas and go party.

We all walked across the stage one by one and got our diplomas from Mister Reiner. Once we were all done, we got to throw our caps in the air. I gave mine a light little toss because I was afraid of losing it.

Afterwards, Connor and I hugged and took pictures with our families. Then, it was time to head over to the Midnight's for our party. This was something we had to celebrate. After everything we'd been through in the past year, we did it. We were graduates.