Everything Has Changed: The Lost Years

Chapter 6: Bonding

Sitting on the edge of the stage with his hands full of tangled strings and broken puppets, Quasi worked quietly, making slow progress on the puppets that Mr Spencer wanted to be part of the show. The break from painting gave him the opportunity to watch the rehearsals going on around him. Well, one rehearsal in particular.

He couldn't quite stop his eyes from drifting back to Maddy, although he was sure no one would blame him. She was the lead, and she acted like it, putting all her energy into her parts like this was an audition for some professional production and not just rehearsal for a school play. It was hard not to watch her.

She went back to being laid-back as soon as her part was over, though, and he caught himself still watching her as she joined her friends and chatted with them, not paying attention to the other students as they practised their parts. She laughed at something someone said and glanced around, her eyes catching his, and he sucked in a breath and looked down, studying the mess of string in his lap with interest, starting to work on it again.

Like he needed any more reasons to be embarrassed by his own existence, now he was staring at people. She probably thought he was weird. Not that he cared what she thought, of course. Definitely not. He just hoped she wasn't joking about him to her friends, he didn't need that negative attention right now-

"Hey."

He jumped, heart racing, Maddy's appearance in front of him coming at just the right time to shock him out of his downward spiral. He brushed his hair out of his eyes, glancing at her, little embarrassed. "Oh. Hey."

She jumped up onto the edge of the stage next to him, green-laced Docs swinging next to his sneakers. "I brought your umbrella, it's just in my locker. I'll give it to you after school."

"Th-thanks."

Maddy glanced down at the string in his hands, then around to the other end of the stage, where a group of students were in the same predicament, untangling other puppets together. "Why are you all by yourself?"

He didn't know how to answer that. Had it been his default behaviour, separating himself from other people? Or did he feel like they didn't want him there, even if he hadn't tried yet? He probably looked like a loser, sitting all by himself, but it was easier than trying to include himself and risking rejection.

"You're finding it hard to fit in, aren't you?" she answered for him in the silence, leaning to brush his shoulder with hers. "You're thinking that no one wants to be near you so it's better to just keep yourself. You're a little freaked out still because you're at a new school, a new place, and you're recovering from something traumatic that affected your self esteem in ways that you're only just starting to unpack. Am I close?"

He stared at her, wondering whether she had been talking to Barbara behind his back, or maybe his therapist. "Um... how d-did you...?"

"I get it. That was me five years ago." Maddy smiled kindly, holding her hands out to help him with untangling the puppets. "I'm a foster too. I arrived here with baggage and trauma and a huge chip on my shoulder. And then I got better. I mean, it's a constant thing, I'm sure you know that. But it does get easier, I promise."

Quasi felt like he saw her in a new light, just a little bit. Maybe she did understand what he was going through. He wasn't sure anyone else did. "Oh. C-can I ask..."

"You can ask." She shrugged, tugging at the strings, the two of them slowly unravelling the knots. "The abridged version is that I lived on the streets until I was six, was adopted by a creep who emotionally and mentally abused and neglected me, and was rescued and fostered by someone much nicer when I was twelve. And now here I am, perfectly adjusted, or so my therapist tells me." She nudged him, her tone cheerful. "What about you?"