One way or another (Lesbian Story)

Chapter 17

Clarke POV

-Ark, a year and 2 months ago-

I woke up next to Alyson. She lived alone so her home was a lot smaller than mine. But it was so cosy, specially when she was around. She didn't work but she still had this crazy schedule to worry about. And that was something I asked her a few days ago but didn't get an answer. Instead she told me to leave and she didn't talk to me until yesterday. If we were close and I started to feel the urge to talk to her, which was always present, she would just disappear.

These few days made me think about our relationship: how it all started so fast, if I was really ready to talk to my parents about how much this girl really means to me... And a lot more crazy things. Truth is, I don't mind things started a little too fast. I skipped the part where I question my personality because I may not be with a boy. I just added the possibility to be with a girl. It can't be that bad! What I was worried about is talking to my parents. I mean, I love this girl. And yes, I said love. But I don't feel my parents will be tottally okay with it. But right now I just want to enjoy being witasthe girl I love.

"I love you" I whispered to an asleep Alyson. She opens her eyes slowly and stares at my eyes lovingly.

"I love you too beautiful. Don't leave me, please..." She begged.

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-Earth, present day-

Right when I was about to unbutton Lexa's pants I hear someone clear their throat. I turn around and see Octavia with an annoyed look. I get up as fast as I can and take a glimpse at Lexa. She's so embarrassed! I never thought I would see her like that...

"Clarke, Alyson is asking for you.
Commander, Indra wants to see you." Octavia, said this with the coldest face I've ever seen her have, even though she has been giving me hateful looks since the bombing. She turned around as fast and quite as possible. I am not comfortable with letting my friend go that easily.

"O, why are you doing this?" She stops and looks at me with a deadly glare.

"You two are incredible, you knew that?" The sarcasm was so tangible, I could feel the dagger of her hatred pierce my skin. "First you let your own people to die in a bombing. Second you let Clarke down by leaving her and her friends to die. And now that everyone needs you, you are making out in the woods?" She's right... We have obligations, we need to fulfil them. "You are unbelievable!" I felt my strength leave my body, I can't take this anymore... The guilt of leaving all of those people to die, including my friends, is killing me.

"About the bombing, Clarke was not to blame. It wasn't her fault. I convinced her to leave. It was our best opportunity." Lexa was so sure of her words, it made me calm my nerves immediatly.

"Fault is not measured in intent, but in consequences. And all those deaths, all that blood is on your hands." Octavia left without a second look.

"I'm sorry Sky Princess... I'll make sure she is punished for talking like that."

"No! She's my friend, well, she means a lot to me. And she's not exactly wrong, is she?"

"Yes, she is. We didn't kill those people, the Mountain Men did. And the last of them is here with us. So lets make him pay for what he did to our people." I don't know what it was, if her conviction in what she was saying or the fact she just talked about "our people". She did mean it as if both hers and mine were the same, right?

We started walking back to camp and all I can think about are her lips on mine. They are so soft! I want her so much... In fact, I need her! I need to feel her hands on me, I need to feel her skin, I need to...

"Clarke, what is going on?" Lexa is standing between me and the camp limits. I didn't understand at first but she helped me understand. "Your breathing..." I haven't noticed how quick it was until she pointed it out. I tried to calm myself down but looking into her eyes is just making me imagine the scenario that would've happened 10 minutes ago if Octavia didn't interrupt us.

"It's nothing..." I try to lie but my voice comes out as a husky plea. I need to get away from her... I can't trust my mind right now. I just need a few minutes to calm myself down and take this ideas out of my head.

"Clarke of the Sky People, I'm not stupid... What is going on?" Oh wow! She's so hot when she's trying to prove a point. I have to stop this... But it is so good!

"I can't tell you now. We have to go..." Lexa nodded and got by my side. We walked silently to the healer's tent. I breath deeply before the Commander leaves my side and I walk inside.

"Clarke..." I barely hear Alyson call me. I turn to my mom.

"She was tortured and I can't really know the extent of her injuries here. I need to take her home."

"I don't have a home..." The girl laying there has no emotions... Not even her eyes show any kind of that. I'm really worried about her. Even if she hurted me in the past, she had no fault to be taken that exact same day as my dad. I feel she's hiding something from me but I couldn't be sure. I don't really know what to say and I was trying to come up with something reassuring. That's when Alyson blew my mind...

"I lost my home a long time ago... I don't think I'll ever find it again. It'd be easier to just die..." Both me and my mom looked at eachother, neither of us knowing what to say. Then she passed out and stopped breathing.

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