Falling Free

BONUS CHAPTER

A/N: It was sort of a mixed bag as to whether I should make a new "story/work" of Alfie and Niamh imagines like I did on AO3, so if you feel strongly either way then please let me know :) And for now please enjoy some Alfie and Polly being secret besties

"Looks just like his mother."

Alfie frowned at Polly as she came to stand beside him, unable to tear his terrified gaze from that of Benjamin atop a horse that was taller than Alfie, being led around by Tommy while Niamh stood on the other side of the enclosure with Esme and John, clapping proudly when Benjamin urged the horse into a trot.

"She loved being on a horse from the second she was old enough to hold the reins herself," Polly smiled warmly. "Never liked anyone helping her though."

"Well, if Tommy lets go of them reins and leaves my three year old at the mercy of that fucking monstrous creature, I'll be kicking up a right fucking fuss. There's a reason human's have got fucking legs for walking with, you know."

"I'd say when the next one comes you'll worry less but I would be lying," Polly's eyes fell on Niamh briefly. "You never stop worrying about them. Not even when they're grown. In fact, you worry about them even more then."

"Niamh tell you I take it?" Alfie followed Polly's gaze. "About her expecting again?"

"No but I heard her being sick this morning, and she didn't touch her wine at dinner last night."

Alfie nodded. Polly didn't miss anything; not even during chaotic noisy Shelby family gatherings where Alfie could barely hear himself think over the laughing and arguing and children shrieking let alone take notice of anything else. No, Alfie was loath to admit that he had long ago given up on trying to concentrate when there were two or more Shelbys around because it did nothing more than give him a headache.

But Polly; well she was used to the noise and chaos. She thrived on it, enjoyed it, and welcomed it; the true matriarch of a family such as this one. So it came as no surprise to Alfie that she would notice the actions of one person out of a room of almost twenty.

"She's only about nine weeks along. Says she wants to wait a bit longer before we tell everyone," Alfie said quietly, tensing up ever so slightly as Niamh swung up on the back of the horse behind Benjamin and urged the horse into a gentle canter, laughing with Tommy when Benjamin started clapping excitedly.

"I know you don't want her to see you're afraid but it's ok that you are, you know."

"I feel better she's on the back making sure he won't fall off," Alfie answered. "Although I'm not sure she should be up there either."

"I'm not talking about the horse," Polly eyed Alfie knowingly.

"Oh," Alfie swallowed down the lump in his throat, sliding his eyes to the right to meet Polly's briefly. "I'm fucking terrified it'll happen again and I know she is too. And that's the worst bit I think; knowing she's scared and I can't take it away. All I can think about is how much she cried last time; how she sobbed herself to sleep night after night with grief and guilt, and the pressure she put herself under to pretend to be happy when Benjamin was around. The tears and the pain were worse than all the blood and knowing our baby was gone. And I don't think... I can't watch her go through that again. I can't feel that helpless ever again."

Polly moved closer, putting a hand over his on the wooden fence and squeezing gently for a moment before moving back to her original position.

"It'll be another boy," she murmured.

"Don't care what it is so long as it's healthy," Alfie answered. "So long as it's got ten fingers and ten toes and it comes into the world squealing loud enough to wake the dead and make Niamh cry tears of elation and not sadness, that's all I care about."

"You'll be crying tears of elation too," Polly grinned then, an expression that threw Alfie everytime she cast it in his direction. Once upon a time it had been a mocking grin, one full of malice or hatred, but nowadays it was a reflection of the easy and sincere friendship that had developed between them.

"I don't cry Pol, you should know that by now," Alfie grinned back.

They both knew he was lying.

And when little baby Bethany was born seven months later, Alfie cried the hardest out of everyone.