PEREGRINATE

CHAPTER 26

POV of Inder:

Last month I was at war, the most draining one ever. Engaged in a never-ending fight with myself. Though my first and last thoughts of the day were of hers, the mere sight of her irked me so much that I could not help but lash out. I justified my behavior by saying that she deserved it. She had betrayed me. She was unloyal. Maybe even cunning enough to trap me.

Tonight, she broke that delusion pretty well.

I took away the fair chance she deserved to defend herself. Much less I cornered her, threatened her when she was already down. The very woman whom I could not wait to see for the two weeks that I was away. For whom I was waxing poetry. And I had assumed the worst of her in a blink of an eye. It did not make sense.

I owed her this talk weeks back. Then maybe I would not have been miserable sod for all this while, recklessly hurting her and everyone else. Instead, I just acted like a man-child

Despite her words, Maitri had not given up on me completely. Though she rightly accused me of being the worst, she continued to engage with me, stand up to me, look into my eyes, and let me know exactly what was on her mind. She was fearless. I was in awe. And a little scared. There was plenty of humiliation too.

She did not hold herself back. She was frank about her tumultuous mind, and the struggles she faced on her own. Matters were already worse with her and I just thrust the dagger deeper.

Yesterday morning I approached her as I needed answers. The fact about assuming the worst of someone was that when it comes to humans the possibilities could be endless. I was losing my mind over what was the actual reason of hers for hurting me. So I hunted her down.

She was so high in spirits that I missed the way she was swaying, holding on to the rock, taking short quick breaths. I was so taken by her that I turned a blind eye to all the apparent signs of her illness. I was not ready when she fell from the boulder and barely was able to protect her head from bashing into the rocks below. I had perched her upon a high rock. It was foolish of me. She could have slipped off the wet surface. 

When I picked her up and walked to the tree, I found out that the damn horse had roamed away while we were talking. With no other options, I had to run all the way back to the castle with her in my arms. Midway it had started pouring. So we arrived at the door drenched and shivering. Though I could hear my teeth chattering, I was more worried about Maitri. She should not fall this sick in her condition. It can be fatal to both of them.

One of the guards tried to take her away from me but I clutched her close to me and warned him to stay away with a snarl. I did not want to be separated from her. The others immediately backed away. I should have registered the shock on their face, their mistrust but I could hardly move my eyes away from Maitri's pale face and blue lips. Her breathing was labored and we needed to warm her immediately.

Then Nani broke out from the crowd and tried to guide me to their quarters. It was not warm enough there and the rooms hardly had any ventilation. No, she was better off in my room.

The entire day went away with me hovering over her, piling up blankets when she shivered and wiping her sweat away when the fever broke. Isha, Nani, and sometimes some other servants kept on making sporadic entries into the room almost as if expecting me to behave inappropriately with her. 

Their distrust pricked me but I understood where they were coming from. I highly doubted that she had told everyone about her condition. But still, to be on the safer side I did not let them stay around for long and made sure she was always covered.

She was unconscious for long hours. It gave me an opportunity to look at her properly and study her. Usually, if my gaze lingered a beat more than the duration she considered appropriate, I was called upon. Her long reddish brown hair was braided down her back. Strands of hair did come loose and were spread across the pillow. Though I was not that much older than her, in her deep slumber with those mischievous and cynical eyes shut she looked so much younger. No wonder I was not the only one taken by her.