This Is...A Happy Home

And The Secrets Start To Pour

One day has passed, since, Cameron Hayes had kidnapped Abel. One day, since, Kip had been murdered in cold blood. One day, since, I scrubbed the kitchen floor of Kip's blood. The images rushing in my head as I remember watching Hayes slide the knife in to Kip, like he was a tub of butter. I have the guilt hanging over me ever since yesterday.

Gemma is now on the run from the police, so, Tig and some of the lads from a different charter has her hidden in a motel. One day, since, she had killed the blonde girl who had tricked her with a doll in the back seat. One day, since, she was framed for killing Cameron's son.

Even though it is the next day, I still keep replaying yesterday's events in my head. Over. And. Over. Again. A son for a son. That phrase, going around and around in my head. I still can't wrap my head around the rush of it. How can someone do that to an innocent baby? Take them away from their loving home? I place my hand on my stomach hoping no one came for my baby.

I go with Clay and some of the other lads to Jax's place. A place that I never thought I would go back to since yesterday. I knock on the door and walk in as Tara sees me and the lads. I glance over at the kitchen and stare at the floor, where Kip had laid bleeding out. I still can't believe I had the courage to clean that floor last night, after Skeeter had arrived to collect the body. It's moments like these I wish I have my mother around. She always seems to be a sense of comfort around times in need.

I look at Tara snapping out my thoughts, "Where is he?" I ask referring to Jax. My attention has to be on my brother. "He is in the nursery," she tells me. I head there with Opie and Chibs. Jax is laying passed out on the ground. "Oh, Jax," I sigh. I hate to see him in this state, which tugs on the guilt I feel.

Tara looks at Clay. "He's been like that since it happened," she says. I hear her say this as I go to sit Jax up. "Come on Jax, you got to snap out of this. Abel needs you. We need you," I say. The club isn't the same without him. It is too quiet without the sound of laughing and joking around. Everyone is just worried about Jax, and finding Abel. "We may have found out something," I tell him. Something being that we heard some news this morning.

Jax seems like he is still out of it, so, Chibs and Opie take him to the bathroom and get him in the shower. I sit on the floor, leaning against the crib with tears down my face. Clay comes over to me and bends down. "You can't break now Lex, your brother needs you," he says. I wipe my tears away, "I know, but it's hard," I say as I get up from the floor, he stands up straight.

I go to head in to the kitchen where I see Piney holding one of Abel's toys. I hug Tara. She hugs me back. This is the last thing I would ever think I would do, but, I am so thankful for her being here for my older brother during this tough time, instead of bailing. I withdraw. "How you doing?" I ask as she shrugs. "Struggling," she admit. Must be hard for her, since Jax hasn't spoke when he came back from the docks, without Abel. "Yeah, I know the feeling," I say. I am also struggling. Seeing my brother this way is crushing me.

Jax comes out the bathroom all dressed, a few minutes later. I go up to him glad he is all cleaned up. I kiss his cheek and give him a slight smile as he smiles slightly back. "I love you," I say wanting him to know this. "I love you too," he says. I smile. "Let's head to the clubhouse," I say. I take his hand and we go to walk out the house.

At the clubhouse, we head in to church and take our places at the table. "Is everything sorted for Half Sack's funeral this evening?" I ask. Opie nods his head. "Yeah, should be," he says. Kip's death has been hard for all the lads, since they thought of him as a loyal member of the club, and he was a main part of the brotherhood. I always feel like he died a hero for trying to save Abel and me. I look at Jax.

"You going to be okay for this evening?" I ask. I still haven't told Jax or Chibs that I am pregnant. I don't think it is the best time. "Yeah I should be fine," Jax says.