hard feelings - an erling haaland story

thirty-seven

Erling's eyes glossed over as the cold Manchester air hit. It was the crisp kind, the sort of atmosphere that took your breath from the lack of oxygen within it. He blew warm air into his hands as he slowly jogged towards the pitch, preparing for a long training session ahead of him. Though, the lack of warmth in the atmosphere didn't do anything for his motivation. His mind was filled with concern for his girlfriend, with the colder temperatures and the darker days, it seemed as though she had hit a slump. Jack gave him a greeting pat on his back, bring Erling back to reality. "Ya alright, geez? Out of it today?"

The taller man hesitated to respond, unsure on what a fitting response would be. Would it even be appropriate to tell the Brummy all his worries about his girlfriend? The very same girl that said man was very close to. It had been something too complicated for Erling to process, he pondered whether Jack would be able to shed any light on the situation. "It's Mia, she, I don't know, bro. She's being weird."

Jack nodded, his hair falling out of place, as he did so. Erling watched as Jack ran his fingers through own hair, noticing every move he did. The nod had uneased him, as though Jack would be able to fill in the gaps he was struggling to understand. "Our Amelia, strange woman, isn't she?" Jack sighed. "Are you on about her cryptic text to you? Saying she couldn't do this right now?" The blond nodded, his eyes leaving Jack's features and darting around to anywhere but the man from Birmingham in front of him. The sigh didn't settle the feeling in his stomach. "She told me she clarified things with you and spoke to you in pers-"

Erling interrupted Jack mid sentence. "She's been avoiding seeing me in person for nearly two weeks now, Jack. Just tell me, is she ending our relationship?"

Another sigh from Jack cemented what Erling had concluded was true. He didn't want to show any weakness to his teammates and knew that whatever fine he would face for leaving training before it even started or turning up to the pitch late would be better than letting a few tears slip in front of his team. A ringing formed in his ears, it grew louder as he got further from the training pitch, until Jack's voice calling his name became nothing but part of the ringing. His vision was blurry, the ringing growing louder as he saw inched closer to the changing room.

With a swift push of the door, silence embraced him. All the noise stopped, all he could hear was his mind looping the words 'she wouldn't end our relationship through a simple text, right?'. It was stupid of Jack to suggest that Amelia would ever do that to Erling. She was always the communicator from the two of them, it would be so unlike her to end something so serious to the both of them through a text message. A message she retracted almost immediately, spamming him with texts telling him to ignore her and she wasn't in the right mindset. He knew her, better than anyone he might've added, and he knew that she would never do anything to that extreme. A glance to his left showed his complexion: red, tear stained and hair out of his bun. He could return to his training and blame his appearance on the biting air that engulfed the open field, but he was fearful that Jack would've tried to lie and cover for him; done it awfully and ended up spurting the truth out. A fine wouldn't hurt him, neither would losing his starting spot in the week's fixture. Not seeing her, not seeing Amelia and getting clear answers, however, would hurt him. It would hurt in ways that he would never be able to verbalise.

With a defeated huff, he made his way to the building he knew she would be located in for the day. Her clinic day. She was so close to him, yet so far away. He could run to her and be by her side within 5 minutes. And so, Erling did just that. He stood outside the practice, waiting for her to leave for her lunch. Erling was never one to cause a scene. He paced back and forth, his hair now practically out of the bun, the hair tie holding on to the thinnest strand it could. The cold was nipping at him, making its presence known to him. It felt like years had passed before he lay eyes on her. It was still surreal to Erling to see her in her work uniform, he barely got to. Her dress seemed to drown her, it was too big and too loose, something she had vastly complained about to him. "My tunic is too tight and sits on all my blimmin' rolls, E. I hate it! Then there's the stupid dress, same size as the tunic and its too loose and nooo, of course, I can't take it up, despite me looking like I'm a cap away from looking like I've decided to dress up like Florence Nightingale!" He laughed at the memory, as she glanced at him, her colleague next to her looking almost star-struck.

"I'll never get over you dating Erling fuckin' Haaland, Tiatto. Alreet for some, eh." He teased. "Let us know if any of the women's team are after a fella, Mr. Haaland. I'll leave youse two alone."

He glanced at her, to see a slight smile on her face, her eyes almost asking for forgiveness. "You're meant to be in training, E. What are you doing here?" It was like she was frozen by the staff entrance. A little nook around the corner hidden away from everyone. It was perfect for the intense conversation Erling had ran through in his mind.

"Had to see you." He responded, his eyes locked on her. He watched as her pupils expanded in size as their gazes fought the urge to look away from the other. "Couldn't just let you go, just like that. Never, Mia. This means too much to me."

"E, please. I just don't want to ruin our relationship, I really can't afford to lose you permanently. Last time, it was fine. Now, what if something major happens and I lose you permanently and there's no coming back from that?"

"It was fine, last time?" He raised an eyebrow, inching closer to her. "Mia, you have never been able to lie to me. You're scared because of last time. You're a clever girl, amor mio, but sometimes you don't use that brain of yours. You want to break up because you are frightened of losing me? So you think by kicking me out of your life, you are not losing me?"

"We can stay friends, then we'll never have to worry about falling out or losing each other, E! We can be in each other's lives forever. I just can't be your first serious relationship, E. One of us will get hurt. If we're meant to be together, we'll find our way back to each other."

Erling kissed his teeth at her suggestion, he knew she was panicking. Amelia had always been headstrong, with the exception of her own best interest. She followed every small gut feeling, even if it was the result of her own overthinking and the entire scenario playing in front of Erling was an action of that.

"I do not want that, Mia. Do you think I could just be your friend after being with you?" The couple were so close that Amelia's breath was warm on Erling's hand. "When I've been able to kiss your lips and linger in my thoughts about how it tasted and felt? That is very silly of you. I would be dripping with jealousy if you came to me, as a friend, to talk about some man, who will always be inadequate compared to me." Erling's voice was now a whisper. "They wouldn't know you like I do, kjæreste." His fingers traced around her neck, as he moved stray hairs. The tips dancing around an area behind her ear, sending shivers down her spine. Amelia wanted to blame it on the cold winter air. "They wouldn't know about how even the tiniest touch here send something through you." He whispered. "We've already found our way back to each other. Stop being so frightened of your feelings. I am not the same fourteen year old boy who was frightened of his feelings for you. I am not ashamed to love you irrevocably. I am yours and you are mine. Always have been and always will be."

Amelia frowned, her gaze now fixated on the zip of his training coat. She had known she had been an idiot even prior to sending the text to Erling. Chloe had told her, Jack had told her and her juvenile brother had told her. Giovanni had reiterated to his older sister that he loved Erling with his 'whole heart, and that's a lot'. Whereas, despite the fact he loved Amelia a lot too, it was simply not on the same level of love that he had for Erling. The young boy went around telling everyone at his school that Erling was actually his brother because Amelia and Erling loved each other very much. She was almost embarrassed to look at Erling. To tell him, he was right, that it was stupid to throw their relationship away and that she had always been his and would most probably be for the rest of her life.