With his coffee mug in his hand, Logan takes his seat beside me on the couch. Sipping from my own mug, I permit the warm and bitter fluid to soothe me as it cascades down my throat, before noticing the male's right hand resting on his thigh. It continues to experience occasional feeble tremors, and the sight alone is enough to bring a frown to my visage.
I can't help but reach out and cover it with my own hand. The male's leaden-blue orbs dart toward it, and, after observing it quietly for a moment, he curls his fingers with mine. My lips tug upwards and I look at Logan, prompting the hunter to meet my gaze. A subtle flush appears on his cheeks and he clears his throat, averting his face.
"So—", I start while rubbing the back of his weak hand with my thumb. He emits a hum to notify me that he's listening, albeit he resumes drinking his beverage. "—what are we?"
"Hmm?", the silver-haired male turns his head to me.
"You and I?", I attempt to explain, "We? What are we?"
Logan slightly furrows his brows at my question and he answers as if it's the most obvious thing ever, "We are hunting partners."
"No, I know that...", I chuckle awkwardly before gesturing toward our hands. "But I'm talking about this. About what we did last night and earlier in the kitchen."
I notice his jawline clenching a little and he slowly retrieves his hand from mine. That's not what I expected him to do. The gesture surely causes my muscles to constrict a bit. "I don't know what you mean...", Logan answers while gazing down at the coffee mug in his hand. His tone of discomfort reveals how he's intentionally evading facing it. "We are still hunting partners."
Maybe I should cease here, knowing that it's best to not push him, but my own insecurities don't permit me to back down. I fail to stop the minor scoff that leaves me followed by, "So what? It's common for hunting partners to have sex?" The hunter visibly flinches at my words and tone before swallowing thickly, his Adam's apple bobbing.
He cradles his mug with his hands while I position mine on the table to rotate in my seat and face him properly. Perhaps it's my gaze exerting pressure on him that the male feels obligated to explain, which he does after sighing, "Look...I don't know what you want from me... We both are males...so if not hunting partners...then what could we even be?" He makes a delicate grimace and adds, "It's not as though we can be lovers..."
His response and facial expression cause my heart to dwindle to the bottom of my stomach. I lower my eyes while my chest constricts painfully. "My being a guy disgusts you...doesn't it?", I mutter. "Each time we share an intimate moment, you're left with a lingering bitter emotion once it has passed..."
When the male doesn't reply right away, I look up, scanning his face for the answer instead. Logan continues to stare at the mug in his hands with a pained look before dipping his head with a heavy exhale. "Yes... I feel disgusted...", he utters at last and the agony that I feel is almost unbearable. Tears prick in my eyes and I avert my face to conceal them.
From my peripheral vision, I see Logan cover his visage with his right hand as he continues, "It leaves a bitter emotion...and I feel so disgusted...but not towards you." The male slightly rubs his face and allows the hand to slide up into his hair instead before revealing, "I feel disgusted by myself..! I disgust myself..."
My head swivels in his direction and my brows furrow. With his palm shrouding the right half of his face, Logan keeps staring at the dark fluid in his mug. "My emotions sicken me...and I detest it! It shouldn't have been like this! Even the night in the club! Despite being drunk, it still felt like a pure nightmare, having Gwen kiss and touch me. But when I spotted you at the doorway...for a brief moment, my dazed mind envisioned it being you fondling me down there and...and I got fucking aroused!"
