HER

The Realization

Days passed by we become so close and we had a mutual understanding. Then we realized that we both love each other already.

We both know this is wrong cause you have a girlfriend while I have a boyfriend.
Little did we know our feelings for each other is growing stronger until you become my girlfriend.
( we both cheated on our partners)

It was January 29, 2014.

We had a dance performance. You're the one who's holding my things while I'm performing. I also gave you the passcode of my phone.

After the performance, we ate together with D and my friend. I'm wondering what's your problem because you're so distant and cold to me. After we ate, you left. I don't even know where you went. I asked D what happened but she said "Nagselos".
I was very confused. Then I remembered you're holding my phone that time. I called you but you won't answer. I texted you but you did not respond.
I looked for you. I looked for you at the campus for more than an hour. I'm sitting at the stairs when you texted me. You're at the 3rd floor, near ROTC office.
I rushly run to the location you mentioned. It was twilight, the hallway are a bit dim. I saw you. My heart beats so fast thank God I found you. You did not looked at me. I walked slowly to get near you. I asked you what's the problem. You're hesitant to tell me the reason why you're acting like this. Then gladly, you opened up. You saw our conversation and pictures with my boyfriend. You were hurt seeing all those conversations and photos. It stings. I was hurt and I totally understand why you're acting like that. I cupped your face, and stare in your eyes. My heart is beating so fast that time, and I still remember how it feels like until now. I wiped your tears and apologized. Then you were shocked because my lips touched your lips. It was our first kiss. It was the first time I kissed a girl. I assured you that I'm going to break up with him and you nodded.

Days passed by, you broke up with your girlfriend while I'm still having a hard time how to break up with him because he's very kind. I asked you to give me more time and luckily you agreed.

February 11, 2014.

I broke up with him, I know he didn't deserve to be treated like this. He beg me to stay but I told him I did not deserve him. He's way too good and I can't love him the way he deserves.

February 14, 2014.
We celebrated the valentines day with your friends and tweetybird (my friend).
I was so happy that day. This is the first time that I felt so much joy in my life.
Later in the evening, when I am already going home. He came, handed me flowers and even greeted me a happy valentines day. I thanked him then I went home.

Everything is running smoothly with our relationship. I am not out about being my sexual preference. I was shocked when he told my family about you. I understand why he did that. He's hurt. I did not even confronted him about it. My family scolded me, saying I don't have any shame. They want us to break up or else I will stop studying. It's hard to choose.

When we met in the campus I told you everything. I cried my heart out. I looked at you and kissed you. I told you that "it's us against the world". I decided to lie to my family saying that we already broke up so I can continue my studies. We meet up secretly because my brother kept on  visiting me in the campus without any warnings.

April 2014, they told me that I need to stop studying because they know we're still together.  They even wanted me to get out of our house, that I need to pack my things and leave. I was really broken and frustrated. I've got nowehere to go.

Then mum, she grabbed me out of the house, shouting at me, naming me, cursing me. Saying I'm a whore, that I was not contented from the dick, that's why I switched to fingers. Oh God! This is so embarrassing. I cried my heart out.

Days passed by, you went to Tacloban because of your MS3 training. I was very happy for you because you were chosen to be part of the training which only ROTC officers can join.
A lot happened on that month. You shared to me all the hardships you went through during the training. You always make time to call me. While me on the other hand I'm trying to calm the tension between me and my family. We haven't seen each other for weeks. I fought for you. I fought real hard even. I applied for a scholarship in the University so I cna continue my studies. I washed other peoples clothes just to support myself.

January 18, 2015.
We celebrated our first anniversary. We're so happy that we were able to celebrate our anniversary. That we fought, we stayed together and face all struggles. I experienced a lot of first times with you. I kept on surprising you to show you how much I cared about you. How much I loved you.