January 19, 2024
Hi! I haven't updated this yet.
I was so busy these past few weeks.
I miss you. I really thought that I'm getting used to not seeing your face. I noticed my self that almost every night I found myself staring at the mirror. Asking myself where did it go wrong? Why did we separate. It's been 2months since I cut you off.
I miss you so much that it's breaking my heart.
I haven't noticed that yesterday (January 18, 2024) it was supposed to be our 10th anniversary. I remember the first time that I saw you, the first time that we talked. Our first date.
I tried to divert myself, I went to clubs, I spend most of my time with my friends. I can't let myself stay in my room because I know I will just relapsed.
By the way, I installed a dating app. I met few people from there. There's this one girl that reminds me of you.
How she clings to me, how she asks for "lambing". How she appreciates me. Every time I talked to her, you always came to my mind. That we used to converse like this. We met after a month of conversing through chat. She's so sweet that she gave me a bouquet of flowers. We just talked and roam around.
Almost everything about her reminds me of you. It feels like I am cheating on you. I know, you're already happy now and you don't think about me. It just feels weird talking to another girl. She really wants to be my girlfriend but I told her I am not ready yet. Do you know why? Because you're still here. You're still the one I love. Fuck! Why is it so hard to get rid of you.
Every time I'm doing something or went somewhere you pops up out of nowhere. That we used to this, we used to visit that place. God, I'm doing my very best to forget you. But I can't fool myself. You're still the one that I want to spend the rest of my days.
I miss you. Even though we're no longer seeing each other, I always have this space in my heart, waiting for you to come home. Waiting for you to comeback.
I will wait for you. Even if it takes years. I'll wait.
I love you my buzz light year.
YOU ARE READING
HER
SaggisticaHow You Get Them Is How You Lose Them. This is supposed to be my diary. All scenes in this story are all based on true events. Please disregard the typo or wrong grammar. I just want to share my story cause it's been heavy lately. For me she's like...
