HER

The Confession

We're living in our own world. A world full of love, adventure, dreams shared together. A world where no one can stop us from loving each other. A moment of happiness.

August 1, 2016.
It was so sad knowing that we're going to have our first LDR. I stopped studying and continued working. I was really hesitant because I'll be away from you but I wanted to give you life that you deserved. I wanna buy that motorcycle that you kept on asking that your mum won't give you.
Days passed by everything is running smoothly. We managed to make time for us to catch up. Every rest day I will travel for like 5 hours just to see you.

September 25, 2016. There's this gut feeling, I'm uneasy. I decided to buy a new simcard, texted her. Pretended I'm one of her fans in campus. Pretended I was the girl who requested to have a picture with her during Miss Intrams (I honestly made this up, this picture thing. Turns out, it's true that there's a lot of girls who wants to have a picture with you)

September 26, 2016. 4 am. I texted you.
I was shocked because you responded but did not sent me a message to my real number. After a few topics, you want us to meet. I was shaking literally. I was at work that day. I agreed (I'm planning to meet you, so you will be shocked that It was just me)

Same day, 11 am. I texted you using my real number. You responded "I'll text you later, class is starting".
Then texted you using the dummy number. I was flustered when you respond.

I responded that we'll meet after lunch. You agreed. I asked you if you don't have any class. You responded "we have a class but it's okay to use cellphone". My jaw dropped. My heart is beating so fast. My hands and body are trembling. I don't know what to say.

Tears are falling down my face. My heart feels like I was stabbed a hundred times. I forgot my plan my intrusive thoughts came. I called her. She answered. I asked her "who".
"What who??" She asked.
"Are you going to meet this girl at the library?" I asked.
"What do you mean?" She asked.
"The girl who took a photo with you during miss intrams" I answered.

She's speechless.

"It was me, aHahaa lol! So, who is she? I asked.
She said "idk what you're talking about".
"I know it already" I responded. (I don't have any idea if she really cheats, I'm just trying to catch her)
"Sorry" is all I heard from her. So I was right. She cheated.

She told me they're no longer seeing each other and etc.
I asked you if you had sex with her. You answered yes, a lot of times at home.
I was really broken. I can't even explain what I'm feeling that day. My body became cold as ice.
I went home as fast as I could. Fate is toying with me I guess, It took me too long to find a cab. I'm standing on the road crying, waiting for a cab.

It was already 9 pm when I got home and she's already sleeping. I looked at her. I was really mad. I didn't wake her up. I just sat down on the floor, sobbing. I cried silently.

Few minutes later. She woke up, her eyes widened when she saw me. She's crying while confessing everything. She kept on apologizing. We stayed up until morning trying to get things back together, trying to puzzle every piece. Where did it start to fall apart.

The happy, no doubts relationship that we had was changed to full of doubt's relationship. You tried to get back my trust. You told me that maybe you cheated because of our situation. That we're LDR. That you're longing for me.

Weeks passed by, I opened your account. I saw this new friend of yours. I don't know this girl. I checked her profile. Read each comments, and I saw your account in the comment section. My jaw dropped. Hahahaha this comment was around early week of September 2016.

When you went home. I asked you about her. You stuttered. You said she's just a friend and often joined you during drinking sessions. I kept on asking questions and puzzling every answer you gave. Something is not right. I told you, this is your side chic right? You just stared at me. Tears falls down on your face. "I'm really sorry, please don't leave me" you begged me to stay. I don't know what answer should I give you. I'm really broken.
But I'm madly in love with you. I tried to understand you. Your reasons for doing those things. I'm so stupid cause I give you another chance. Another chance to straighten things out. Weeks passed by we're doing fine. We're trying to build it again.