Love & Scars

He Fucked Up

Sirius wanted her for so long and now she was straddling his lap, a hand in his hair and one on his bare chest. His mind went fuzzy when her lips travelled over his skin. But they never travelled upwards, her lips never met his and then it hit him that she just wanted sex, knowing kissing him would change everything. When he denied her, how much it hurt him to do so, she pushed off him and turned her back towards him.

"Izzie, don't push me away." He pleaded.

"I'm not." His heart broke how her voice trembled, how he knew she was close to tears. He wanted to reach out and pull her into his arms. "But I think I'll head to bed. Night, Sirius." She walked out without glancing back. He bounded after her.

"Izzie!" He called after her, but the music was still blaring in the common room, swallowing up his words. He ran down the stairs but saw how she grabbed a bottle of whiskey and headed up to the girls' dorms. "Fuck!" He cursed, crashing down on a chair in the corner of the room.

On the table next to him was a bottle of scotch, he grabbed it and drank straight from the bottle. Trying to forget what had happened. He couldn't remember the rest of the party, he couldn't even remember how he got to bed. But the worst thing was that his heart had stopped beating from the look on her face the next morning.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" Remus asked with a smile. Izzie was lying in his bed, the empty bottle of whisky on the floor next to her. She groggily lifted her head.

"Been drinking, can't take sleeping potion." She said with a slurred voice.

"Alright." Remus nodded without another question and hopped into bed with her. She rolled over until she was curled up into Remus's chest. "I've never seen you this drunk."

"Got carried away." She lied. "Thanks for the party, Remus."

"Anytime, love." He kissed the top of her head. "Are you sure you are okay?"

"As okay as I can be." She muttered in his chest. "Goodnight, Remus."

"Sleepwell, Izzie." He tugged her a little closer to his chest before they fell asleep.

Izzie's stomach clenched when she woke up, not from the whiskey she had been drinking the night before, but from what happened with Sirius. She groaned in her hands and Remus's arm tightened around her protectively. She looked over her shoulder where Remus was sleeping soundly, his sandy blond hair fell in front of his eyes. She needed to apologize to Sirius, she knew what she did was wrong. She could blame it on the booze, but she wanted him so much. The booze just pushed her over the edge, otherwise she would have kept her distance until she was really ready. She climbed out of Remus's bed, still in her clothes from the party. Remus frowned a little until she stuffed a pillow under his arms.

She walked over to Sirius bed, heart pounding rapidly. 

"Sirius?" She whispered. "Sirius? I wanted to apologise. Yesterday -" She opened the curtains a little and her breath got caught in her throat. 

Sirius was naked and he was desperately trying to cover up a naked, sleeping girl. Her stomach clenched together so harshly that it made her physically sick, her heartbeat stopped as Sirius eyes found hers. "Oh." She breathed out. "So, you meant you just didn't want to do that with me. Good to know!" She screamed, probably waking the others. A tear slipped from her eyes, and she let the curtains go, hiding Sirius and his latest prey. She ran out the door.