Plants VS Zombies: What's going on?

I'm not qualified (Just block their bullets!)

Fun fact I learned recently about Zombies.

They aren't very smart...

"Stop running into the bullets!" I yelled at my coworkers, my flag waving above my head as I cheered on the march of the undead.

Immorticia sat beside me on a lawn chair, eating a hotdog as a swarm of bats flew above her.

My Coworkers all worked together to achieve our goal, Consume the brains of the last human alive.

Like an unstoppable machine, we already got rid of most of the human population, with only two people left.

"Don't just walk in a straight line! Dodge! Zig Zag maneuvers!"

How did we win? How could the governments of the world fall to us?

"Stop! They don't even have that far of a range! Just stay two meters away!"

"Puff!" I fell to my knees as all my coworkers lay dead on the lawn, their bodies disappearing via some sort of Zombie power to be reanimated once more.

Who knew we had Teleportation technology?

"HA! IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?!" I grit my teeth as the blonde, tanned tomboy, yelled at me, her metal baseball bat swinging above her head as the pair of goggles on her head reflected the light from the single light bulb above her door.

I would have cried if I had working tear ducts, but alas I couldn't.

"DAMN YOU!" I yelled dramatically, holding my arm to the sky as I tried to hold the moon, "How could you just kill your neighbors like this?! Have you no empathy?"

"EMPATHY?!" The girl screamed as the plants she planted collapsed into mulch, leaving her lawn clean and empty, "YOU'RE THE ONES WHO'RE TRYING TO KILL ME!" She pointed her metal bat at me.

"Kill you?! We just want to eat your brain! How is that in any way killing you?"

"OH, I DON'T KNOW. MAYBE IT'S THE FACT THAT I'LL DIE IF THAT HAPPENS! HOW DUMB ARE YOU?!"

I scoffed at the girl, already tired of her always shouting at me, I just needed to keep supporting my coworkers in their attack on her lawn.

"Hey, Who's that?" I felt my super sweet fiance of several hours ask as she poked me on the shoulder with a stick, pointing to a woman wearing a white button-up shirt, a pair of jeans that barely fit, brown sneakers, and a metal pot on her head, walking into the girl's lawn and passing her a bag of what seems to look like seeds, before turning back and walking away as if nothing just happened.

"Thanks Dave!" The girl said without screaming her lung out, waving goodbye to the older woman as she walked back to her home.

"I thought Dave was a guy," I whispered and looked over to Immorticia, seeing her non-reaction to what just happened, "I guess Zomboss misspoke or something, Now what the hell did she- WAIT A MOMENT!" I pointed at the girl.

"DON'T YELL AT ME!"

"YOU CAN'T JUST START PLANTING YOUR DEFENSES! MY COWORKERS ARE STILL ON THEIR WAY!" I yell at her, pointing an accusatory grey finger at her before I run into the van and yell over the comms for my Zombie brethren to hurry up and continue their assault.

"Minion! Terrible News!" Zomboss's noise suddenly came over the van, causing me to jump in fright.

"Don't scare me like that!" I yell at the microphone before I take a deep breath and calm down, "What is it?"  I ask once I manage to get my heart to stop thumping.