(Warning: S.H.)
Chapa's Nightmare:
I woke up and found myself lying on the ground. I got up to see that there was nothing around me. There were no cars, no trees, no sky, no roads, just a world of darkness. I started to walk around to see if I could find anything that wasn't darkness. Eventually, I found a small patch of light. As I got closer, the light got bigger.
Then, I started to see something else: it was a group of people, but not just any group, it was my friends, and my girlfriend. They were all calling out to me, like they were trying to get me to come back to them. I even saw a sign that said "Swellview Welcomes You." I stood there for a minute, but then, I felt the urge to run towards the light. I ran and ran for so long, but it was almost as if the light kept moving away from me the more I ran.
Just when I thought I was gonna make it, I suddenly found that I couldn't move. My feet were stuck, and as I kept trying to move, it felt like I was getting shorter, but when I looked down, I saw that I was sinking into the ground, as if I was in quicksand, but there wasn't anything, just the darkness. I started to realize that there was no chance of escaping, so I just gave up, and I let the darkness consume me.
(End of nightmare)
Chapa's POV:
I woke up screaming, and it was a few seconds before I realized that it was only a nightmare. I was still shaking, so I took a few breaths to calm myself down. I eventually did, and I got up to go to the bathroom and closed the door.
I looked at myself in the mirror, and I suddenly found myself crying. My face was turning red from the tears that were running down my face. I covered my face with my hands so no one could hear me crying. After about a minute, I stopped. I wiped the tears off my face, and I took a few more deep breaths.
I eventually went downstairs to find that I was all alone. Then I remembered: my mom started her new job today. I hope she does good, it is her dream job. I have no idea where my dad and my sister could be, but I didn't care. I just really needed this time to myself. For some reason, I was feeling a bit more tired than usual.
I looked at the time on the microwave, and it said 8:12 A.M., which surprised me. I didn't really wanna bother going back to bed since I was already up. I didn't really feel hungry, but I was actually thirsty, so I poured some Orange Juice into a cup, carried it with me over to the couch and set it on the coffee table.
I turned the TV, and of course, there was nothing good on. Why do I even bother anymore? I decided to turn it off, and instead, put some music on. I grabbed my headphones, plugged them into my phone, and as I was about to turn something on, but then, another call from the Man's Nest came in, and I was confused on why it was coming in this early, but for some reason, my mind told me to not answer it, so I just let the ringtone go on until it stopped. I don't know why, but for some reason, I wasn't really in the mood to talk to anyone right now.
Anyway, I turned on the music, and I closed my eyes. When I woke back up, my playlist was almost at the end. I stopped the music, and when I looked at the time, it said 9:05 A.M.. It seemed like the day was going by so slow, so I decided to go out for a walk on the beach to pass the time. I went up to my room to get dressed, and I even took out the black sandals that I bought at the gift shop. I put them on, and they were perfect. I grabbed my sunglasses, my phone, my house key, headed out the door, locked it, and put my key into my pocket.
I started to head towards the beach deck. Once I got out there, I took off my sandals as I ventured down the steps onto the sand. It was a little hard to walk, but the sand did feel good. I put on my sunglasses, and I headed down to where the shoreline was. Once I got there, I started to walk the direction the shoreline was in. The water felt good whenever it came up over my feet, and the more I was walking, I started to feel happy. Maybe this was all I needed: some time to myself, or so I thought.
As I was walking, I started seeing couples walking along the beach together, and it reminded of how much time Mika and I used to spend together. Suddenly, I felt my happiness slowly disappearing. I stopped for a moment, and I turned to face the water. I stood there for a moment, hoping I could stop my sad state from coming over me again, but it wasn't working.
I decided to head back to my house, and when I got inside, I slowly started crying again. Moving to Florida was a huge mistake my parents made, and I knew I couldn't convince them to let us move back to Swellview, especially my mom. She never cared about me, no matter how many times she's tried to prove me wrong, but I still know that Sage is her favorite child. I couldn't deal with this anymore. I knew what I had to do.
I put on a different pair of shoes, and I headed into the city, looking for a place to shop at. I eventually did, went in, and I bought a few items. When I came back, I went upstairs into the bathroom, and I shut the door. I set the stuff down on the floor, looked at myself in the mirror again, and I started crying. As I was doing so, I took out the stuff: a pack of razor blades, concealer, some other makeup, and some new clothes.
🔔Graphic warning 🔔
I opened the box of razor blades, took one out, and held out my right arm. I was about to do this for real. I slowly brought the blade to my wrist, and I made the cut. Blood started running down my arm, but I kept going. Once I was done, I did the same thing to my left arm.
The pain felt so good, and I was really enjoying myself. I started to feel a little dizzy, and I suddenly passed out. When I woke up, I looked at my phone, and it said 1:04 P.M.. Jesus Christ, I was out for that long?
I also happened to see that I missed a call from the Man's Nest, but I didn't seem to care at the moment. I started to realize more and more what I had just done. I couldn't let my parents see it, or else they would make me see a therapist, and believe me, I did not wanna have to deal with any of that.
I took the concealer that I had bought, and I dabbed some onto my wrists so that the cuts were in no way visible to anyone. I left the bathroom and hid the stuff under my bed so that it couldn't be seen. I took my new clothes and hung them in my closet.
In case you're wondering, they're basically emo clothes, and I had even bought some makeup to go with it. I didn't want my parents to see them, either, so I even kept those hidden and just decided to wear them whenever I was alone.
After that was done, I looked outside for a brief moment, and I shut the curtain. At that moment, I just felt the need to be surrounded by darkness. It somehow seemed to comfort me. After I did that, I went to lie down on my bed, and I turned my music back on.
