Cross of heart

Four

"Remember what ever happens outside the town does not get mentioned to any of people." The governor was talking to Jen by the barrier while the crew transferred materials and weapons into the shelter.

She looked at the weapons and food they were carrying and then she looked at children's faces in the distance of seeing canned goods.

"Fine, I won't say a word." She looked down and the gov patted her back,
"Perfect, thank you. Look I know what we do might seem bad and I know it is but this is how we keep these people safe. They depend on us."

"I know I just wished things worked out differently." Jen just rubbed hr face, she so stressed out.
"I do too, I worked different situations in my head on how we can do these things more simpler but they always turn out bad."

"I can be content with what just happened but I could have been shot, I don't appreciate being bait."

"I promise I won't have to put you through that situation ever again. It was wrong of me to do that to you."
Jen nodded and crossed her arms.

"I'll make sure of it. Today's done we got back hrs before sundown and by the looks of this, we won't need to go out again until next week. So your duty is over now."

"Thank you." Jen was about to leave but the gov stopped her," look today is the fight and I know you and some others don't like to see it but I hope you do come down tonight. Maybe Shane might like it, he seems like the type of guy. "

"I will keep that offer in mind, sir." She continued walking and waved goodbye.

.........

Jen walked down her door and looked for her key. Most people in this town don't use a key or lock their door because they feel safe, which they should but Jennifer likes to keep a key just incase any walkers over run this place. She placed the key inside but a door creaked open behind her, she turned around and it was Andrew.

"Hey, Andrew hows it going?"
He looked at her quietly with fear in his eyes," look, Jen, don't worry about me anymore. I won't be knocking on your door annually anymore. Or going to you when I'm drunk."
She took a step towards him,"Really? No more late night where I punch you for coming into my apt drunk?" but he closed the door quickly and locked it.
She looked at her door and back to his.

"Well... Why couldn't that happen when we first met?" She finally opened the door and there in her kitchen/dining room was Shane and Merle drinking red ribbon beer...and laughing.

"Woah, what the fuck is going on?"
Merle and Shane died down the laughing and drank one more gulp," Your boy right here isn't that bad, better than your brother actually. "

Jen placed her shotgun at the corner of the room by the chair," Well that makes me feel better." She said sarcastically.

"You're welcome and you know these hours that I've been talking to Shane have really been sumthin."

Shane smiled and raised his beer. Jen came closer to the table and grabbed a beer," That's wonderful.." Jen sounded half generous and half sarcastic.... But mainly sarcastic.

"Yep, it is, I was just talking to Shane about how I can persuade The gov to let Shane guard the barrier or something...you know to get onto gov's good side."
" oh my god so cool!" Still, she continued being sarcastic.

"Awh come on you don't need to be a lil bitch."Merle finished his beer and put on his button up, and walked to the door," Well I should be heading now, ill see the both of you soon."

Once the door closed behind Merle, Jen laughed at Shane, she couldn't believe they were sitting together having beers. On day Merle is threatening to kill Shane and the next he's rubbing asses with Shane.
"Seriously....Merle? Im gone for over eight hours and you two are BFF's now, what kind of shit have you been smoking?"

"I normally wouldn't even try with Merle but he's a really funny man. Plus he has great stories of him and his brother's childhood."

"Well, i bet his brother is as crazy fuck as him," Jen said sitting with Shane at the table
"Just a little bit. "

Jen started fidgeting with her fingers, it would be difficult to ask Shane what she was gonna ask," Look, Shane, I need to talk to you about something."
"Anything you want dear."

"Is Rick still alive?"Jen knew what the answer would be, she's had the same answer since she flew in from Michigan but she still wanted to believe. Still, believe Rick was alive.
"Umm well, I don't know how to put this but, he's gone, Jen."
"He is?" Jens hopes were crushed, again.

" was that before the coma, cause I know he was in that coma before this started happening."
"No, he didn't, I tried to get him out of the hospital but I couldn't. I sealed his door to make sure no one would go in there. They were shooting patients and doctors... It was crazy."
"So he's still there?"
"No. While the apocalypse was still going on I tried my best to get Lori and Carl out of town to a retreat center but it was too late. It was already in ruins. So we formed a group with others and stay in the woods. Just months later after the crew did a city run, Rick came back with them. Without him, they would have never got out. I was so grateful for that."

Jen couldn't take it anymore, she broke out in tears and Shane left his chair and comforted her.He stood behind her and help his hands on her shoulders, embracing her from behind.

"I can't believe he was alive. I thought he was dead and I never got to properly say goodbye. Even knowing he got out of that coma, and you seeing him die is horrible. I thought he could make it. I even remember flying out to the south...to Georgia. I didn't even make it to the hospital....it broke out before I got to Georgia and I was all alone. If only I left a couple days earlier I could have been in that room with him. I could have been with you, Carl and Lori and everything would have been different."

Shane thought about it, everything would have been different but went back to reality to Jen, "Your a strong person. You've made it this far by yourself.that takes power."

Jen shook her head and just covered her head on the table.
"If you want I can stop and tell you how everything happened later."
"No. Tell me now. It all needs to come out now."
"Fine, one day we went out back into the city for supplies, we went back to camp and people followed us. They wanted our weapons and food. We didn't give it to them and they tried to kill us. We all fought back but it wasn't enough. One of them had Lori held a knife against her, Rick went crazy to get her but they slit her throat. Then Rick became mad and they shot him multiple times. I remember seeing him fall to the ground. Carl was in shock, I tried taking him with me, to safety but they hit me from behind, grabbed Carl and he kept screaming. They couldn't take it anymore so they shot him, right in front of me. It was painful seeing my best friend die. His wife that I became really close to, almost best friends and carl. A son to me ripped away from this earth." Jen kept crying and Shane shed a tear and hit the table.
He kept the lie going, "I always think to myself how I could have done better, how could I have saved them."
Jen hugged Shane," No, you did your best. You tried your hardest to save them and that's all that matters."
She looked at Shane's eyes and he shed a tear forcefully. She kissed him and he became loose.

"Im so grateful that I have you now. I guess it's just you and me now."Shane held her close and he looked outside. Covering his sadness and letting anger appear at what he really felt for Rick.