Philasande & Mabalwa {UNEDITED}

Our Love: Philasande & Mabalwa 14

Chapter 25

"But doc what could have been the reason for my miscarriage?"
i asked this question feeling so shattered,I didn't know I promise if I knew I would have done so much better.
He's just standing there,in the corner of this room,he looks like he hates me,I don't know what that look but I can feel it,he hates me.

"I'm really sorry Ms Vilakazi about your miscarriage, Miscarriages can be caused by various factors, including chromosomal abnormalities, maternal health conditions, lifestyle factors, and more..."

i became even more baffled by this statement.
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we just got back from my check up appointment at the Hospital,I'm currently watching the Kardashians on Disney plus.
He walks in the lounge,pushes the coffee table towards me and he sits directly in front of me and he does this blocking the television from my sight.
i put down my box of lindt chocolate and pay attention to him.

"How are you?"
Yeah,no.i know he did not just ask me that question.
ME:"how am I?nginjani vele manginje weh Philasande.
I am feeling very shattered you detached yourself from me when I needed you the most I didn't know either... you made me feel like it was my fault and again I say I did not know I am sorry that I did not know but it is not my fault and I refuse to put the blame on myself I refuse to let you make me feel like shit it is enough now and once again I am sorry healing takes time and you best believe it is taking time I hate waking up feeling the way that I feel everyday I hate having to wonder how I would have found out had I gotten the chance to find out I hate having to wonder how morning sickness feels like ,kodwa yobe Gumede,I'm sorry,bengi ngazi."
at this point I'm a tearful mess,I don't know why but I really just want him to be empathetic towards me, understand me.
His head is bowed down between his knee's and I only realise now that this man is crying.

"I'm sorry, it's not your fault sthandwa sam, I'm sorry I made you feel like this,i didn't mean to, I've just been finding it so hard to cope and I don't know how to be there for you but I promise you I'm willing to try sthandwa se ntliziyo yami,I want u to heal and I want you to know that I'm ready, I want us to cleanse and ng'funa uk'thumela iy'nkomo ka Vilakazi."
I can't help but just go into his arms and he carries us to our bedroom.