Lethal Beauty

XL - Grief

There was a time in Abel's life when he wondered if he would ever shed a stream of tears. He had always been a calm child and had never felt the need to be so dramatic in his life. Nevertheless, as he felt powerful eyes on him as he gazed at his Nonna's grave, he realized that this was the time to experience something close to dramatic.

It was simple. They stood over it and thought---it was such a lonely sight.

He opened his mouth but couldn't even scream. Instead, it was a soundless cry. Abel collapsed to the ground and tears started streaming down his cheeks. Iris did not only hear it. He felt it. Felt every ounce of pain, regret, and remorse. Unable to bear it any longer, he fell on his knees and pulled Abel into his arms. Abel cried. His whole body shook as the grief washed over him. It was the kind of pain felt all over one's body. It was the hardest thing in the world to deal with...

"I want my Nonna..." he sobbed. "I want her back."

Jessen watched. A few weeks ago, he had to suffer the shock and numbness of losing the only woman he cared about all his life. Now, he had to deal with seeing her grandson suffer the same. The day to lose someone wasn't the worst---it was all the days they stayed dead. Love was indeed a big responsibility. One must use the word judiciously. One cannot love one day and take away love the next day...

He thought only the mortals would understand this world. This emotion. But it was more painful to a vampire who had to live their lives eternally only to witness that someone becomes a distant memory.

Jessen moved forward; his whole body was screaming to comfort the young man. But as soon as he made his intention known, Iris glared at him warningly, forcing him to stay back. "You've done enough," he said with a tone filled with resentment.

The words were one way of telling him to keep his hands away. Maintain his distance. It appeared this cat was more territorial than any of the members of the Laiho clan. He should've known. Then again, Iris must be correct about one thing. He wasn't like his mother.

The others stood silently; their expression was serene. They watched as Abel reached out with a trembling finger, feeling the edges of the cross of the nameless grave. "Our last conversation, we fought because she was delayed in answering my calls..." Abel's soft voice resonated. "I didn't get the chance to tell her I love her."

Iris' heart broke. He brushed away his tears with his fingers. "It's all right, Abel. It's all right. Wherever she was...I'm sure she has forgiven you. I'm certain she knows how much you love her." He leaned over and kissed his forehead. "You're not alone. I'm here for you."

Abel searched his gaze. "I won't lose you too, right?"

He smiled. For a moment, Abel thought he had seen how beautiful those ocean-blue eyes truly were. As if he was seeing his incredible camouflage form and his white spotted coat. The playful ghost of the mountain. His favorite cat...

"I am never leaving you," he vowed.

⛧☾༺♰༻☽⛧

Having something and losing it, was so much crueler than never having had it. Grief can come in many different shapes and forms. Grief was felt with more impact than unhappiness, seeping deep into one's being. It could be difficult to know what to do with these big feelings. Considering this, they let Abel go through with it naturally. Neither one of them wished to intervene.

Iris went down the staircase and saw the others waiting. "He fell asleep," he announced and everyone sighed in relief.

He turned to look at Jessen standing by the window. The discussion about the past was not finished yet. There was something more to say. Something more to dissect. Only that Jessen had said the most crucial part of his tale and he had nothing else to share. Not because he didn't want to reveal anything else, but because even he didn't know the whole story.