The Scent of Roses || Coriolanus Snow

Chapter VI

When Garnett stepped out of the transportation car, you didn't know whether to congratulate or tell him how sorry you were. His eyes were dead again. Even when he looked at you, they remained cold and lifeless.

He tried to smile at you, to let some emotion show. He tried to show that he was happy to see you, and you knew deep down that he was. Garnett was glad to be alive, happy to have made it out. But what happened in that arena and what he had done would haunt him for the rest of his life. You didn't know what happened in those first minutes when Doctor Gaul had you distracted. You didn't know if he had to kill anyone to make it into hiding or if he had seen anyone get killed.

A loud whistle blared throughout the station. You were back on the platform overlooking the train to take him back home, a much nicer carrier than the one that brought him here.

"Garnett," you said softly, still at a loss for words. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that. But I'm also not sorry because you made it out alive."

He smiled for a moment knowingly at you. "I don't know whether to be happy or sad," he said, looking towards the train. "Honestly, I just want to go home."

You bit your lip and nodded. Of course, he didn't want to stay here. You were ridiculous for ever thinking such a thing. That somehow he'd like to stay with you, or he'd like you to come back with him. You could never do that anyway, and it would never work. He said that even in your dream, but that reminded you of what he said before Cedar woke you up.

He wouldn't let it.

Who was he? Was he talking about himself? Cedar? Some other man that had been keeping you two apart? You had no clue.

The train whistle sounded again—last call. You turned to Garnett, your tongue caught in the back of your throat. The world around you felt so small as you tried to talk to him, tell him how you felt, tell him how much you'd miss him. He cut you off before you could keep stammering.

Garnett embraced your face in his hand as he pulled you close to him, pressing his mouth deep into yours. It didn't last long enough; God, it could never have lasted long enough. His lips were soft and delicate against your own, but the passion behind them was hot and deep. You felt your body melt into him as he kissed you like you had never been kissed before. Like you never had even known what a kiss was until now. He let you go quickly, wiping his thumb across your cheek.

"I will see you again, really see you again," he said before he ran onto the train. Your hand reached out for him as the door closed behind him, and the train began to move.

You stood motionless on the platform as you watched the train roll away, gone to you forever. Finally, when it was out of view, you snapped out of whatever daze you were in. No peacekeepers, or rather anyone, were around to witness that.

Thank God. If they had been, you might've been hung for doing such a thing. Kissing a tribute. What the hell were you thinking?!

However, as you walked away from the platform and to the direction of your home, you kept looking back at the train tracks, hoping he was still there and you were still wrapped up in that embrace.

The air was stale in your apartment like it hadn't been refreshed in weeks. You hadn't been here longer than you had realized. Most of the time, you spent the night at Cedars', but you didn't think you'd stay there again soon.

You walked towards the fridge, opening it to see nothing worth eating, then you walked to the sink and splashed water in your face, ultimately ruining your makeup, though it didn't look terrific initially. You were exhausted, and a hole of emptiness had formed in the pit of your stomach. The reflection in the sink didn't look like you anymore.