To Be Together

Feelings

Mo Ran looks down at his food. Bright red. Steam coming out. He feels happy to be back home. Sitting by himself in Mengpo hall. He just got back from a mission. A typical ghost hunting a rich family though he took a bit longer because on his way he helped a small village on his way back.

He went to Red Lotus pavilion but no one was home. There was no one he can ask to learn where Wanning is. Mo Ran has no excuse to ask where he is. Since he was hungry he decided to eat.

Mo Ran could not help but wonder what Wanning has been up to. Hope he's safe. After he eats he's going to find the man, to check on him.

"Ge!" Mo Ran looks up from eating to see Xue Meng and Shi Mei walking towards him with their tray in hand. "You just got back too?" he wonders sitting down across from him.

"Yeah. How'd your mission go?" Mo Ran asks.

"Good." Xue Meng says, not happy to be back. Mo Ran raises an eyebrow.

"Is something wrong?" He asks, worried because he's only seen Mengmeng this sad once. Five years ago. Shi Mei looks at him wide eyed.

"When exactly did you get back?" he asks.

"Long enough to walk here and sit down to eat, why?" Mo Ran says hiding the fact he went to the Red Lotus pavilion first. They don't know about that. Shi Mei blinks, gives him a nod.

"Then you don't know. Shizun has been stuck with Tanlang." Shi Mei informs the other. Mo Ran blinks, that explains why Wanning wasn't home. But then that raises the question as to why Wanning is with Tanlang even though they hate each other.

"W-what happen? Why?" Mo Ran asks eyes wide, blood rushing to his brain, heart beating so hard against his chest, hands shaking. Body feeling numb.

"Tanlang has been trying to make a pill that works but nothing's worked so shizun has been staying at the medical wing." Shi Mei explains.

"What? Why?" Why would they continue to do something so dangerous? Did they not see how horrible the first time was? Mo Ran wants to march to Tanlang and beat him. What does he think he's doing to Wanning?

"Why hasn't mom stopped them?" Xue Meng asks, face looking like he's ready to cry.

"She did. Shizun resting now. This last one was rough. At this point shizun is stuck... like... that." Shi Mei says not sure how to mention Wanning anymore. Mo Ran lets out a sigh. Tanlang berated Wanning for holding his hurt in but saw no problem making him test it. Xue Meng also lets out a breath, happy to hear that.

"Can I visit?" Xue Meng asks Shi Mei.

Shi Mei opens his mouth to answer but gets interrupted by a large group of young female disciples giggling with each other. Xue Meng turns his head along with Shi Mei. Mo Ran tilts his head to hear.

"Really?" One of the females whispers.

"Yes I saw it with my own eyes when I went to visit my older brother. He's one of Tanlang disciple." Another says.

"But I heard they hated each other." The first one asks.

"But doesn't that make it better. Enemies to lovers." A third female points out.

"They make such a powerful looking couple. Yuheng elder and Tanlang elder. Fighter and healer." A fourth female says dreamily. Xue Meng chokes on his food, Shi Mei chokes on his water, while Mo Ran sits silently with eyes growing wide. 

"I saw Tanlang caring for Yuheng, and she look really sick when I came in. And when I left I saw Tanlang leaning closer to Yuheng face." The second female says. They can hear her smile. Then they can hear the girls squeal.

"A-Ran?" Shi Mei calls, Mo Ran blinks looking at his shixiong. Shi Mei looks down at Mo Ran hand then looks back up at Mo Ran. Mo Ran looks down to see he broke the chopsticks in his hand, clenching his hands closed so hard his blunt nails are digging into his skin. He's bleeding a little. He relaxes his hand, giving Shi Mei a smile.

"Holding in my laughter is hard." He jokes. Obviously a lie though Xue Meng and Shi Mei believe it. He'd rather not let them know just how angry he was about the image in his head the women happily help paint. It's just gossip.

"I'd rather not think about it." Xue Meng says rubbing his temple.

"Let's hurry so we can visit shizun." Mo Ran says, voice deep it almost came out as a growl, getting up to replace his chopsticks.

They eat in silence, even as they listen to the woman continue to gossip about the romance between Yuheng and Tanlang. It took everything for Mo Ran to not rage. Logically Mo Ran knew that the possibility of Yuheng and Tanlang actually being in a romantic relationship is zero, just the idea of it has Mo Ran want to snap someone neck. He has to remind himself: it's just gossip.

As they walk to the medical wing Mo Ran thought about why it angers him so much? Of course he would be possessive of someone that belong to him for so long but this Wanning isn't his. Mo Ran shakes his head. He shouldn't be possessive. Remember respect and cherish. Cherish and respect. He's just a disciple and no matter how much he...

It doesn't matter how much his feelings, his love, for Chu Wanning is, right now he should do his duty as disciple because the gods know he doesn't have a track record for that. His feelings... his romantic feelings for Wanning are secondary. He doesn't deserve more.

"Shizun!" Xue Meng shouts as they walk into their teachers room. They find Wanning leaning against the headboard of the bed, arm out for Tanlang to hold. Seeing them together makes Mo Ran burn with jealousy but he kicks it down.

"Just in time." Tanlang says annoyed, who knows why? "You better listen. After this week your body needs more rest. Of course I'll be doing more research on the pink dust but no more pills." He says to Wanning who silently nods. Tanlang leaves without much else to say.

Wanning gets up, putting his shoes on, hiding those cute pink toes away. Then starts gathering some scrolls and books he has spread on the bed. "Shizun need help?" Xue Meng steps up with his smile. Wanning stares for a minute before shaking his head.

"You go rest, didn't you just return from a mission?" Wanning says, bending over to reach for a scroll further away.

"It's no problem, I got some rest earlier." Xue Meng says taking the books Wanning had piled together.

"How long were you here for?" Mo Ran asks taking half the book pile from Mengmeng, adding some scrolls to the top.

"A week." Wanning says.

"Shizun, you were here for two weeks." Shi Mei corrects having collected some scrolls to carry.  Mo Ran and Xue Meng pause, looking at Wanning horrified. In return he gives them a sharp look.

"I do not remember half of it." He answers as if that's any better. Mo Ran clenches his fingers around the book hard, Wanning was here the whole time he was gone. Why so long? Why didn't auntie stop them earlier. "Shi Mei took care of me, that much I remember." Wanning adds.

"Really? That explains why he knew. Good job Shi Mei." Xue Meng says smiling at him.

"Very much so." Wanning compliments.

"T-thank you for the praise but I was just doing my job." Shi Mei says, face feeling hot. He ducks away for them not to stare.

Mo Ran continue to stare down at the books in hand. Shi Mei was here taking care of him. He knows Shi Mei is very good so why can't he stop his mind from screaming: it should be him?