For Worse or For Better (Shawn Mendes)

Looking Closer

Because of you, I am afraid.
-Kelly Clarkson

"Oh, it's you." Shawn mumbles, looking me up and down. He turns back to the girl in front of him and pecks her lips. "I'll see you at lunch, Haley."

The girl eyes me suspiciously, flicks her hair over her shoulder and bounces down the hallway, catching up to a boy and kissing his cheek cheerfully.

"Ugh," I moan, rolling my eyes. "And there it is."

Shawn rounds on me, his eyes scanning my body judgmentally. "And what's your problem?"

I give him a look and snort. "I don't have a problem."

Shawn doesn't throw back a sarcastic comment, which surprises me.

Instead, he huffs and rolls his eyes. "Hopefully today goes better than yesterday." He mocks. "What's your first class?"

"Earth science," I respond, checking my Wednesday schedule and ignoring his arrogance. I've had two days of school so far and I'm determined to not let Shawn affect my third day.

Shawn frowns. "What, do I have every class with you?"

I grin. "Yep, you're stuck with me. Better learn to like me."

Shawn knits his eyebrows and swivels around. "Follow me." He mutters, slumping down the hallway.

I took my eyes and step after him, feeling a little like I'm traveling in his wake.

As we turn a corner, a shout echoes through the hallways. "Skylar!"

I turn to see Tyler sprinting toward me and I immediately smile. "Hey, Tyler!"

He falls into stride beside me and nudges me with his elbow. "Making friends with Shawn Mendes?"

I laugh. "Yea, okay. Nah he was assigned to show me around. No idea why they chose him, though."

Tyler eyes Shawn suspiciously. "I don't know, honestly. But I can offer to take his job, if you want..."

I find myself shaking my head. "No, that's okay. I can manage." I give him a smile and Tyler shrugs.

"Okay, well 'tis my time to depart. Catch you later?" He asks.

"Absolutely!" I call as Tyler backs away from me.

He winks and disappears into the crowded hallway.

I step a little quicker to fall beside Shawn, maybe I am get him to talk without being a total jerk.

But before I can say anything, he turns to me with his big brown eyes. They look dull and dark as he scowls at me. "That your boyfriend?"

I find myself laughing suddenly. "No, just a kid I met on Tuesday. Tyler."

Shawn doesn't respond. He looks straight ahead, slowing down as he walks down the corridor, his shoulders back, his body seating from side to side.

"Here we are." He mumbles, gesturing with false elegance. "Please, feel free not to sit anywhere near me."

I sneer at him and say, "Much obliged."

I push past him and enter the classroom, taking a seat right in the front.

Turning around, I catch a glance of Shawn, who actually sits right behind me, his feet once again up on the desk, his fingers tapping away at his phone, his mouth pressed into a tight grimace.

Does that boy ever smile?

Does he have anything that makes him truly happy?

As that thought crosses my mind, Shawn happens to look up and see me staring.

His eyes flicker to my face and then to his feet, which he slowly takes off the desk and let's them drop to the floor.

I knit my eyebrows. What's up with this kid and why did he just-

"Class, take out a pen. Pop quiz on what we learned last year."

Groans and muttering fill the room as everyone shuffles papers and looks for a pen.

I grab one and uncap it, ready to wing this quiz.

I feel a forceful tap on my back and I whirl around to see Shawn's thick hand rested on my back.

"What do you want?" I ask harshly.

"Jesus Christ, feisty, I just wanted to borrow a pen."

"Why don't you try asking nicely." I say stubbornly, crossing my arms.

"Gimme a pen."

I don't move an inch.

"Can you gimme a pen?"

I still stay silent.

Shawn huffs and looks away. "Mitch, got a pen?"

A boy across the room who looks terrified throws a pen at Shawn, who catches it effortlessly.

Twirling the pen around his fingers, Shawn winks smirkily at me.

I roll my eyes and shake my head, turning around so I don't get in trouble for talking during a test.

"Thanks for that pen, feisty," Shawn mumbles to me sarcastically, his breath tickling my neck.

"My pleasure," I say through gritted teeth.

Don't let him get to you.

That's what he wants.

I take a deep breath and continue to check of answers, easily breezing through the quiz.

Halfway through the test, my chair lurches and I fly forward, landing on the floor beside my desk.

Snickers fill the room and the teacher doesn't even look up.

Glaring at a smirking Shawn, I sit back down and pull my chair closer to my desk.

A second later, my chair is kicked again and I slam my head into my desk.

"Jerk!" I hiss, snarling at Shawn.

He gives me puppy dog eyes. "It wasn't me, feisty."

I nod. "Uh huh."

I do the rest of the test looking behind me every few seconds.

When the bell rings I get up and follow Shawn to the cafeteria. "This is so inconvenient." He says to no one in particular.

"Well, next time don't volunteer to show the new kid around."

Shawn chuckles. "You think I volunteered? The only reason I'm doing this is because if I wasn't, I'd have detention for the rest of the year."

This sparks my brain.

This is my chance.

"Why?" I ask curiously, prying into getting answers.

Shawn gives me a look. "That's not really any of your business."

I huff. I swear I'm gonna punch this kid.

"You know, you're not really good at making friends." I point out.

"Friends isn't really a word in my vocabulary." Shawn retorts.

"I can tell," I mutter, my fists clenching.

I stare straight ahead, but I catch Shawn looking at me as we turn a corner.

There's something in his eyes that I can't quite place, that I'm determined to figure out.

And then it comes to me.

At first glance, Shawn seems tough and popular-he's muscular and handsome and probably a major sports star, he's a player and he seems to be known throughout the whole school.

But if you look closer, his shoulders sometimes slump forward and his forever rosy cheeks are always sucked in, as if waiting for something to happen.

And as I turn and catch his stare, forcing him to quickly look away, I notice something else.

If you look even closer, you see something in those gorgeous brown eyes of his.

He's terrified.