I think I'm a little bit, little bit
A little bit in love with you
But only if you're a little bit, little bit
Little bit in love with me.
•
"Jasper?"
"Will you?"
When I was younger, I always dreamed of graduating highschool.
Alec and Izzy right by my side, making my parents proud.
That dream isn't coming true...well, at least not all of it.
One of the twins are by my side, and my parents are gone.
"Willow you will regret it if you don't walk on the stage!" Amethyst has been trying to change my mind since I told her a week ago.
"I can't walk across the stage... it won't feel right." I express playing with my food.
"What won't feel right?"
"My parents aren't here....it won't feel right walking across that stage knowing they aren't here to hug me after. I'd rather get my diploma and miss graduation." She says nothing making me sigh.
"I'm going to go sit outside." I stand up from the table and walk out to the porch. Just as I sit down on the swing, Alec walks up the steps.
"Can we talk?" I stare out into the yard.
"Talk or yell? I don't feel like being berated." He sits down next to me and pulls out a picture.
He hands it to me and I smile.
It was at one of my birthday parties. I was wearing a pink dress and a crown. Alec is holding me as i attempted to kiss him.
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"Do you remember that day?"
"Of course I do." I smile down at the picture.
"It was your fifth birthday and because everyone was scared of you, it was just me, you and Izzy. We had fun though. We ran around the whole house playing party games, Izzy pinned the tail on your dad claiming he was the donkey...we ate the whole cake." I giggle at the memories.
"Then when it was time for us to go, you hugged me and said I was your bestfriend forever."
"I proceeded to try and kiss you." I mumble.
"I yelled you had cooties so you ran around the yard chasing me until I let you kiss me on the cheek...truth be told, I wanted to kiss you." I stare in confusion.
"Why are you telling me this Alec?"
" I haven't always been a good friend, and for that I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said what I said to you the other night. It was wrong and really hurtful. I just...the thought of you being with him made me sick. I didn't understand, I still don't. That didn't give me the right to say that to you."
We sit in silence for a moment before I speak up, "your words really hurt...they made me question things. Is he only apologizing because Alice can't have children? Does he really love me and feel sorry like he claims?" I rub over my stomach, feeling the small kicks.
"i don't understand it either, why I would even consider forgiving him. but I'm tired of fighting Alec." I turn to him, my bottom lip wobbling.
"I'm so tired of fighting, being angry. I can't keep doing that to myself, or them." He grabs my hand, squeezing it softly.
"I don't want to forgive him that easily, but I'm slowly starting to. I sometimes look at him and I see the boy that I care for, other times I see the one that hurt me. You can't yell at me for it because I'm already yelling at myself."
"I need my bestfriend Alec...I can't go through graduation, this pregnancy, or life without you." He pulls me into hug and I sniffle.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry for not being a good friend. I promise I'll be here for you, for them,for everything." I pull away from the hug, relief flowing through my body.
"But, I will be honest. I plan on hitting him at least once." I find myself laughing at his words. "I don't expect nothing less."
I rest against him, watching the trees move in the wind.
"How are you feeling about graduation?"
"I'm not walking across the stage." He looks at me with furrowed brows.
"What? Why? This has been your dream!"
"My parents won't be here...there's no point if they aren't here."
He sighs out and rubs my knee, "it's your choice but, I think you should walk. They may not be here but you know their watching in spirit. Make them proud."
