healing hearts

Chapter 16

Ben's POV

Here I am laying next to her with the condom still on. That was just amazing. It was definitely the best I ever had and she didn't do a thing. She just felt amazing. I wanted the first time between us to be good for her, which is why I didn't let her do anything to me. The way her body was reacting to the things I was doing, her moans and whimpers.

God, I could listen to those all the time.

We're lying here quietly, both of us out of breath. I take the condom off and throw it in the garbage can next to my bed. I turn and look at her and she looks back at me.

She sees me looking at her and immediately blushes.

"You okay?" I ask. She looks all flustered and she's breathing heavy.

She blushes again and nods her head. "Yeah, i'm great. Are you okay?"

I smile and put my arm around her, pulling her close so her body is against me and her head is on my chest. I rub her back, "yeah i'm great too." I pause and look down at her, "was that okay?"

I don't want it to be awkward between us now that we had sex. We've known each other for so long and I guarantee neither of us thought we would ever experience this with each other or see each other this way, I just want to make sure she's okay with it.

She blushes and nods, biting her lip as she looks up at me, "yeah, it was really good."

I smile at her and nod, "it was."

We lay there for a few more minutes quietly before she looks up at me, her eyebrows creased and her eyes soft and concerned. I look at her and lift my hand, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

"What's up? You okay?" I ask, a little worried.

She bites her lip, "yeah.. i'm okay. I just wanted to ask if this will change anything between us. I know you aren't this type of person, but is this going to change the way you feel about me? Or are you just using me..?" Her voice goes soft and I can't help but feel bad.

I lift her chin up and make her look at me. "Alexa, my feelings for you have nothing to do with sex. I think you are amazing and so beautiful. I would never use you like that. Nothing is going to change because of this, I promise."

She looks at me and nods her head, "okay. Because i've been used before, and it hurt a lot. But i've liked you for so long and it would hurt so bad if you were lying about the way you feel about me."

My heart aches when she says that she's been used before. I couldn't even imagine using her. She is amazing and we've had such an amazing connection our whole life.

I pull her close to me and play with her hair when she lays her head on my chest. "I would never use you Alexa. I plan on keeping you."

She nods her head and traces the tattoo on my chest with her fingers.

We lay there for a while and I soon feel her breathing get deeper, signaling to me that she's asleep.

I hold her close to me as she sleeps and after a while, I eventually fall asleep too.

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Alexa's POV

I wake up in the morning and roll over. I'm in bed alone but I hear talking out in the guys "living room" area.

I sit up and let the memories of last night run through my head for a minute before getting up, putting my thong on, along with Ben's t-shirt.

Before walking out, I throw my hair up in a messy ponytail.