A Reason For Being

Chapter Twenty-seven

Kei

I arrived at the Hiroshima Peace Memorial. The sky is bright blue. There isn't a single cloud in the sky. The orange autumn leaves fall from the trees. I look at the chilling, skeletal remains of the dome building. Lots of tourists also look at the structure. The dome building had been mostly destroyed alongside the rest of the city, around two hundred years ago when an atomic bomb was detonated. Millions of people were injured and killed. With time, the wreckage was cleared, and new buildings were built. A new city was formed from the ashes. The wreckage of the dome remained and served as a memorial. It became a symbol of peace.

I remember watching a documentary with Misaki and Kaz when we were little. The narrator was talking about forest fires. When the fire destroyed the forest, the ash fertilized the land so that when the trees grew back, they would be even better. The same has happened here.

"Beautiful, isn't it? Tragic but beautiful," says a girl who's standing next to me. I nod and hum in agreement. I'm too lost in my thoughts to pay attention to the girl. I must have been standing here for almost an hour.

"Are you Kei Hayashi?" the girl asks. I prick up at the sound of my name but try to brush it off by itching my head.

"Depends on who's asking," I mutter.

"I take that as a yes. I met your friends and took them to my flat. They sent me to come and get you because they have decided that they're going back to Five. I'm Izumi, by the way." She smiles.

"That's suicide," I reply.

"That's what I said." She says

"Matsu tried to convince me to go with them. He thinks my family might be there. They've been missing for almost a year. The group mentioned that you wanted to run away. So what's the plan? Are you just going to leave your brother and your friends? You're just going to leave them and walk into oblivion?"

Izumi pokes my shoulder hard. It's not that simple. I don't want to leave Kaz, but he's left me no choice. I can't go back to Five because that's where Shingetsu is going. I'm not going to lie. I'm afraid of them. They killed my parents and took my sister. Kaz wouldn't care if I left. Anyway, we've never been close. We have a broken relationship. I was never the best big brother. I teased and picked on him a lot when we were growing up.

"I've lost everything," I say. My hands turn into fists, and I feel my fingers tingling. I'll never forget what Shingetsu did to me.

"Not everything. You still have your brother and your friends," Izumi says.

"They're not my friends. Kaz and the others don't give a fuck about me," I say. I think of Sora. I don't think she realizes how much she had hurt me the other night. It feels like she led me on and used me for her benefit. I generally liked her. She was kind. She showed me that I was safe. I remember feeling lost when my parents died. I still feel that way. That was the problem. We were two lost souls who collided with each other like an asteroid plummeting into the earth. We were doomed from the start. We were doomsday.

"Of course, they do. Why else would they have sent me to get you? Maybe if you stopped being an arsehole, then maybe you'd see. I get that you're scared, but running away won't solve anything. What about your brother? Are you just going to leave him with no explanation? Do you want him to hate you? He's gone through just as much as you. Leaving him will make things worse. You don't know how lucky you are. My family is gone. Shingetsu took them from me. I might not ever see them again. It's ironic. I'd do anything to see them again, but here you are trying to get as far away from your family as you can."

I glance at her blankly. I don't understand. Why does she care? I've always found women who I didn't understand attractive.

"Do you want to go to the museum that's nearby?" she suggests.

I've got nothing better to do. I nod and follow her.

From there, we leave the dome and head to the nearby museum. We see protestors along the way. Their ancestors were survivors of the blasts. They hand Izumi a petition to ban the use of nuclear devices. She signs it and gives it to me. I also sign it and pass it on to some eager tourists. When the one hundred and ninety-five countries existed, Ikgai had another name. It was called Japan. It was known for not having nukes after this disaster, but I guess that somehow they got hold of some when the world went to shit. Ikigai is the only place left out of those one hundred and ninety-five countries that still exists and is inhabitable to people.

We get green tea matcha ice creams along the way and walk alongside the river. I'm not sure if I like the flavour. The museum is free, so we don't have to pay. There are even more tourists inside. They speak a variety of languages. We walk down the hall and read about the history of the A-bomb and its aftermath. An animated video plays on repeat of the bomb exploding and the mushroom cloud that followed. There are videos of victims telling their stories. Once-personal items to someone that were incinerated from the blast are now on display. I'm filled with emotions as we walk through the museum. It's a serene place to contemplate life – distressing, haunting, and graphic. There's a cold and bone-chilling atmosphere. I can't believe that something like this was allowed to happen. It's horrifying. It should never be allowed to happen again, yet it might.

When we've gone through the museum, we go to the flame of peace. It's a monument to the victims of the bomb. We watch the fire dance like two children. One of the flames stretches taller, like a little boy and his big brother. For the first time, I notice that there's no birdsong, no insects. There's no sign of animal life. It's as if the animals know that something horrific happened here. Despite the terrible things that have happened here, it's obvious that the people here are trying their utmost hardest to make the best out of a horrible disaster by preaching about peace.

"You're a hypocrite. You're telling me that I should go when you haven't even made up your mind about whether or not you're going because you're just as scared as me. You're afraid that you'll find out what happened to your family and you'll find out that they're dead," I say.

She looks like she wants to smack me, but she doesn't. "I'm not afraid. I'm fucking terrified. But... I'm going to Five, and I'm going to find them. Are you coming?" Izumi asks. She reaches her hand out towards me, and I take it.