Beta squad Imagines

panick attack - filly

I was at a restaurant having lunch with my boyfriend filly trying to ignore the people who were stood at the window videoing us and taking a load of pictures.

I didn't like that I couldn't have a meal at a restaurant without a swarm of fans turning up. Don't get me wrong I signed up for this as soon as my social media began blowing up and I knew this would happen but sometimes it still bugs me.

I love my fans and everything so much but it just stresses me out every now and then.

"You okay babe?" filly questioned snapping me from my thoughts making me realise that I must've zoned out.

"U-um yeah..of course" i said giving him a quick glance with a reassuring smile on my face.

He turned around and looked at the fans which made them excited and scream making filly quickly turn back to me.

He gave me a sympathetic look and said "im sorry babe I didn't think this much people would turn up"

"It's okay.." i grinned still nervous and overwhelmed for some reason.

Just then the a couple of kids entered the restaurant walking over to us and one of the boys said "i know your busy and all but I was wondering if we could get a quick picture? we've been watching your videos for ages we're huge fans!"

I wasn't too sure if I wanted to because if we said yes to them then I knew that more people would come in and expect us to take a picture with them.

Before I could say anything filly had said yes.

I mentally sighed not wanting to do it out loud before posing for the picture before the two kids thanked us and left the restaurant.

I heard all the kids screaming making me sigh.

"deep breaths babe it's okay it was only one picture okay" filly reassured me with a smile.

But he had spoke to soon.

More people entered and it was a lot more than the first time.

"Can we get a picture!"

"Take a picture with us for insta!"

"OMG Y/N AND FILLY"

"OMGG CAN I GET A PICTURE"

"can we make a tiktok?"

and they were all just screaming. continuously.

Everybody in the restaurant was glaring at us just trying to enjoy their meals.

My breathing became heavier and it then became harder to breath in. I was having a panic attack. I used to have them all the time when I was younger and when I had just started social media but it hasn't happened in years.

I jumped up out of my seat and quickly walked into the bathroom walking into one of the cubicles and shutting the door behind me before sinking to the floor with my back to the door.

Tears were steaming down my face and I was letting out gasps trying to gasp for air. I had my hand on my chest breathing heavier.

Just then I heard the bathroom door open and then somebody knock on my cubicle door.

"It's me baby open up!" Filly said worriedly.

I shuffled over and unlocked it still sat on the floor struggling to breath.

His face dropped as soon as he saw me. He crouched down next to me and shut the door before placing his hand on the side of my face and holding my hand with his other one.

"Breathe in baby..slow deep breaths" he whispered soothingly.

"breathe in...and out" he said and I did as he said struggling a little bit.

I breathed in..

and out.

Multiple times over and over again.

Eventually after about five minutes of doing as he said my breathing became steadier. After another couple minutes my breathing was back to normal.

Although I was breathing okay now and was no longer having a panic attack I was still overwhelmed and crying. and embarrassed.

Filly and I had been together for six months and not once has he ever seen me having a panic attack. I didn't want anyone knowing about them because I was honestly ashamed of them.

"Come here baby it's okay your okay now" he said pulling me into his arms stroking my hair softly.

"I'm here okay" he whispered.

He held me for a few minutes calming me down before eventually I was feeling a little better.

He broke the hug and said "you never told me you had panic attacks"

"im ashamed of them, I hate them. I've just embarrassed myself now" i said letting out a sigh as we both stood up.

He cupped my face and said "don't be embarrassed babe, it's okay you have nothing to be embarrassed about. now let's go home and I'll order something instead"

I smiled and nodded my head.

I don't know what I would've done without filly.