Heart on Fire | Noah Sebastian

Chapter 21

*Noah*

I stirred about the bed before I fully awoke in Belle's bedroom. I reached across to bring Belle back into my arms but she wasn't there. I sat up to comprehend exactly where I was and looked around to find my phone on the bedside table. I lit it up to find it was nearly 11am. Her side practically looked untouched but I remember falling asleep with her early this morning. I was confused but was distracted by a pamphlet left on the bedside table. It was a pamphlet for domestic violence survivors and best ways to start seeking help. Belle left a note inside 'I hope this can help you when you need it' with a small love heart scribbled beneath. It had a helpline number, some basic information and then some numbers to local therapists. I felt a wave of emotion overcome me. No one has ever done this kind of thing for me. A small tear did escape me, but I swiped it away and began looking for Belle. I dressed back into my clothes, thankful that she left my shirt behind for me and exited the bedroom.

I could hear Belle talking in the kitchen. "Patrick, please" she cried. Her brother Patrick? "I've said no before and I'll say no again..." "Of course I love you and the kids..." "Patrick, I'm being inducted as Captain in less than two weeks, I have a whole career here..." "I had this same conversation with William last month".

I felt bad hiding behind the wall listening to her conversation, but I couldn't help myself. She started to get upset. "You're the one who encouraged me to move here..." "And you wonder why I don't bother answering anyone's calls anymore. All anyone does is fucking complain about me to me..." "Fuck me Patrick my life has never mattered to anyone else before and it sure as hell doesn't matter now. Please just go focus on your own fucking perfect lives..." Belle's Australian accent was really showing by this point.

I decided it was best for me to emerge from the hall at this point, the guilt of overhearing a conversation I shouldn't have got the better of me. "Ahh! Fuck!" Belle screams out as I accidentally spook her, throwing her hand to her mouth in surprise. I apologised immediately and Belle hung up her call with her brother, telling him she got spooked by a bird who crashed into the window and slammed her phone onto the counter.

Belle let out a deep sigh to calm herself. "Good morning" she smiled as she snaked her arms around my waist and brought me in for a hug, her whole aura changing on a dime. I immediately drew her in close to me and kissed her good morning. "I'm sorry if I woke you" she apologised profusely from below me.

I cut her off and explained that she didn't wake me and asked if she was okay. She immediately told me yes and then escaped my arms. Belle smiled as she quickly heated up a croissant for breakfast for me and apologised that the coffee she got me went cold. Belle explained that she stopped by the cafe this morning to get us breakfast after she went to work for a short while.

"Belle, what time did you get up this morning?" I asked her, both grateful for the surprise breakfast gesture but also stunned and worried. "What do you mean 7am? Belle we didn't go to sleep until like 4.30. How were you awake at 7am!" I lamented.

Belle brushed me off and encouraged me to eat my croissant and offered to make me fresh coffee. "Noah, I hardly sleep. I have a rigid body clock and work stupid shifts all the time. It's fine. Besides I've had a few coffees, I'm good for the day" she says as she dances casually around the kitchen. I was confused as to how someone could be so blasé about lack of sleep and be like, you know, proper functioning.

Before I could comment any further, Belle encouraged me to have breakfast with her on the back porch on the table opposite her swinging chair. I looked at that chair and memories of last night came flooding back, along with all of the emotion. I felt all of the pain, all of the exhaustion, all of the love and everything in between all in a few blinks of an eye, wave after wave after wave of emotion washing over me. I thought about the feeling of having Belle in my arms as we danced together in her darkened living room and reflected on how her ocean blue eyes looked a little more grey this morning, but I chalked it up to lack of sleep. This was my favourite memory to date. My heart was so full.