solby one shots

Don't give up

TW suicide attempt

Colby's pov
I was sitting in school just looking at my phone seeing I had 2h left in this hellhouse until I can get home but being there alone anyway, my dad left 5 years ago and my mom is always working she is a nurse and never home I mean I could hang out with my friends but they are only my friends when they want something, the only one I have is my girlfriend of 1 year she's not going to this school but we see each other 3 - 4 times a week I really love her if I would not have her I don't know what I would do my life is so pointless for real no fam no friends no fun just school and going home doing nothing if that is the life of a 17 year old then I don't want it, then the bell rang and it finally was time to go home at least a little better then sitting here I stood up and walked out of my room getting to my locker and get my bag I closed it and walked along the hall to the door walking out going to my bus stop waiting for the bus 10 min later he finally arrived I got in seeing all the"cool"kids walking in the back then I saw jessy one of my girlfriends best friends he goes to my school but we never really talk I sit down behind her hearing she was talking to someone on the phone quietly
"yes I know but he won't find out if he ask anyone we tell him you are with one of us"I overheard making me very curious but I mean she could talk to anyone right? these girls have 50"friends" I just leaned back looking out the window"where are you going with him today anyway "ohhh to caffee on woods that is an amazing place"now I was suspicious bc that's mine and my girlfriends favorite spot but hey still means nothing many people go there probably it's pretty popular I looked out of the window seeing I'm almost at my stop great"okay see you later bye summer" making my heart drop she was talking to my girlfriend, shes meeting with a guy and she said again meeting I couldn't believe this, this can't be real I got off the bus and walked home thinking about the call the whole time I never had any suspicion she was cheating or dident love me ever I was shocked or maybe I just understood it wrong or it was another summer I mean she is not the only one in this life with that name right I walked in my house just thinking about what to do I can't just call her and ask bc first of all I can't just tell her that I think that and even when she would cheat nobody would say yes I do I walked in the kitchen getting me a coke walking back and forth in the living room not knowing what to do I mean at least I could text her anyways right I took my phone out and got in her contacts

Babe❤️ hey baby I'm back from school and wanted to say I love and miss you

I send it and waited I walked up my stairs going in my room putting my bag down walking in the bathroom to do my business I washed my hands and walked out I take my clothes off and put my pants and a shirt on all black exactly how I like it I took my phone and looked at it but no text and she dident even see it yet making me nervous not gonna lie but she simply could do something so calm down colby and even if it's true she is just meeting with a boy she can meet with whoever she wants I sit down on my bed turning on the tv just watching a random movie by 5 I still had nothing heared from her so I stood up and decided to go get me something to eat walking down the stairs and in the kitchen just making me a sandwich I got out some ham and cheese and some mayonnaise when I was done I put everything back in the fridge taking my plate and walk up the stairs again to my room I sit in my desk eating while watching tv it was pretty boring but I dident bother searching for something else by 6 I still hadn't heard anything from her still so I took my phone and decided to called Jessy I pressed the greep botton"hello"she said" hey it's colby did you see or hear from summer I can't reach her anywhere"oh yeah she is with us they are in the pool at the moment I let her know you called okay" okay thank you bye "I said hanging up feeling so much sadness and anger rushing through me so it was her it has to be these are to much coincidences to not be here what do I do now I have to see for myself I just have to right, I walked through my room for 5 minutes deciding what to do then I just took my phone and rushed downstairs putting my shoes on and take the keys I closed the door and locked it walking of to the cafe it was a 15 min walk but who cares I need to know what's going on do I oversaturate "maybe"do I make a fool out of me* possible* but I need to know I walked like a zombie not looking for anything or anyone when I came up to it I walked around and walked to the back looking in from outside seeing summer there with my own eyes with a guy sitting on a table smiling at each other and holding hands who are laying on the table I was just staring at them not believing my own eyes I walked to the frond and walked in slowly my head felt dizzy my legs where shacking my hands sweaty I walked in and stood by the door the guy smiled at here and pushed her hair out of her eyes then he kissed her on the lips making my heart jump out off my chest and fell to the ground shattering in 1000000 pieces I couldn't move I just looked at them seeing my gf with someone else the guy tipped her on after seeing me staring at them she turned around slowly looking at me her face falls immediately that was the last think I saw before running out and in to the woods I just run and run until I stopped at a tree just sliding down beginning to cry,my head in my knees why would she do that to me why I was nothing but nice to her I did everything for her and she just cheats on me for God knows how long did she even loved me ever but I should have know that you just can't trust anyone anymore amd of course a girl like her won't like a boy like me that's when I realize that my phone is going of I took it and saw 10 mist calls and 6 text messages from her but I don't care at all I don't wanne hear from her ever again I just blocked her and put my phone on silent I stood up slowly and walk further down the woods seeing trees on my left and railroad tracks on my right I just walked and walked and cried like a little pussy that's probably why she thinks I'm not a man or something or found someone who is more popular like all girls in high school want while I was walking I saw a figur in the distance but I Couldn't make out what it was probably an animal or something I just walked my head empty and my heart shuttered I don't know what to do now when I got closer I could make out a person walking on the tracks thinking how weird,when I heard the train coming, in the distance having my eyes on that person for some reason I just had this strange inner feeling after a few more feed I walked passed him he was short and blond, around my age he was just looking down he had shorts on and a shirt it's a bit cold for that was what I was thinking then I stopped for some reason the train only a few inches away honking his horns but he continued to walk slowly not moving 1 inch making my heard race I began to sprint without thinking I run as fast as I could getting to him just in time to pull him off the tracks with me,inches before the train had hit us my arm around his body falling in the ditch besides the tracks "NOOO-NOOOO let's me goooo he screamed twisting and turning in my hold but I was holding him with all my strength" noooo let's me go I don't want to be here anymore"he screamed again making my heart hurt a tear was rolling down my cheek"let me goooooo"he cry/sobbed now trying to get out but not as intense anymore"sorry but I won't let you go"i whispered to him still holding him as tight "please - please let me go I want to go"he cried harder I could feel his pain through my body "sorry I can't" b-but you don't even know me why would you care "he sobbed" bc I do can you at least tell me your name" I said trying everything to distract him" sam".Hey sam I'm colby could you at least listen to me for a sec"he nodded still crying "I don't know you and I don't know what your going through okay but I'm hear now and want to help you if you let me" why would you, you don't even know anything about me if my friends family or school is not helping me why would you, you will just bring me in a mental hospital and leave like anybody else"why would I do that I'm not a heartless monster" hey how about you come home with me for a bit and we can talk nomatter about what "I'm done with talking"that makes me so sad that in his head he is already gone and done I turned him in my grip still holding him tightly "please sam 1h I mean what can you loss right"I said now looking at him his eyes so red and puffy but also completely empty and lost but he was also so cute he looked in to my eyes im guessing to see if I was serious "okay fine but then you let me go" I nodded but that was of course a lie I would never, I helped him up seeing his arm they where full of scars from selfharming but I didn't say anything I was holding his hand nomatter if that seems weird but I'm not risking to let him go,soon we got to my house I opend the door and let him in I closed the door locking it and put the keys in my pants we took our shoes off "you want some hot chocolate" he nodded " okay sit down I get us 1"I walked to the kitchen getting 2 cups putting it in and put them in the microwave looking at sam his head down staring at his finger I took them out putting a few mini marshmallows on top walking back to him sitting besides him "here" thank you he takes it looking at it I see a smile for a split second "do you live alone" he ask "no that is my parents house but my dad died and my mom is never home" I'm sorry about your dad " he mumbled" it's okay sam it hurts more what happened today "he looked at me" can I ask what happened "I caught my gf cheating"he looked at me sad "I'm so sorry that is horrible"yeah that's why I was in the woods I caught them 30 min earlier now I have nobody anymore " but enough with me tell me anything you want about you" I'm sam I'm 17 and I'm gay" okay I smiled im colby I'm 17 and I'm bi I smiled at him "do your parents know" I nodded yes they both knew he nodded looking down and it kicked in my head "so that is the cause ha" he slowly nodded tears rolling down his face again I reached out and wiped them away with my hand not thinking about what I do "please don't cry sam you want a hug" i ask "yes please he said his lip quivering I scooped closer pulling him in my arms holding him tightly running my hand up and down his back he just cried in my shoulder" nobody love me"he said his voice cracks" that's not true sam" it is my parents have beat me for 3 year until they kicked me out today my siblings where so horrible to me you have no idea and everyday in school I get spit on or water poured over my head or kicked and much more" he sobbed almost to hard to understand but I did and it made my heart physically hurt for him " I'm so incredibly sorry that happend to you I wiped my own tears away real quick" can I please go now please" I hugged him a little tighter not wanting to let him go" please don't go" colby don't you understand I have nobody and no where to go I will end up on the streets getting raped or something" you won't stay here for the time being and I will do anything to help you" colby we both are 17 what would your plan be and how would you help me" being there for you and being a real friend for example I don't care 1 bit that you like boys or how you dress or look like or anything but I care that I can't let you go give me at least a mini chance you don't have to trust me or like, but let me try and help please you can stay here and my mom is a nurse so we can ask her to document injuries you probably have and if your parents ever come back we have evidence and your word and mine and when your 18 you can life wherever you want and get a job you don't have to give up bc people are sick and disgusting you are so young and definitely strong you can do it yourself,I'm sure you have your whole life anyways and you made it this far you can make it much further I know you think how will you know all this but if this is going on for so many years you did anything on your own until now like I said you don't have to like me trust me or even talk to me I totally understand but I really want to help you" he looked up in my eyes for the first time since the woods his eyes looked so broken I never seen anything like it,if I ever meet anyone who did this to him they meet Satan" please " I looked at him pleading but serious" I really mean it give me 1 week to at at least show you I mean it if you then still want to go then go" * obviously a lie* "you really mean that ha" I looked straight in to his eyes nodding " but why I don't understand why you care for a stranger so much I mean in the world are millions who need help to" yes I know but I believe in everything happens for a reason and that I was there to safe you had a reason and if I at least can safe one my life then my life had a reason and purpose and you seam so sweet and had hell on earth for who you are nobody deserves that "okay okay 1 week but I don't and can't promise anything" I nodded "for now you want to shower and sleep in my room I sleep on the couch I'm sure your exhausted" I don't have any clothes as you see " I find something for you follow me I show you the bathroom and bring you some okay" okay " he said with a small voice I get up and walked upstairs to the last room opening it and let him in the towels are here I pointed to it and you can use any shampoo if you want okay" he nodded I closed the door and walked in my room opening my closet and looking through it to find something he could fit in,in the way back I found sweatpants that don't fit me anymore for quite some time and a pink shirt that's way to small for me I get some boxers and socks and walked back to the room "I leave you the stuff outside the door I'm in my room if you need anything just call" okay I heard walking back in my room hearing the bathroom door open and closing I walked to my bed chancing the bedding hearing the shower turn on when I chanced anything I put him some charger and water on the nightstand soon I heart the door opening "colby" I'm here sam " I said soon he walked in" hey I made you your bed and the clothes fit I see he nodded "are you sure you want the couch I can sleep on it you don't have to give your bed and room up" don't be silly of course I'm sure the couch is completely fine with me I also put you a charger if you need and some water and you can come to me at anytime no matter what the time is okay I insist " he nodded slowly" if you need anything come down and wake me up "thank you colby" he said I smiled walking out my room and downstairs going to the couch sitting down turning on the tv I just thought about the day today from being cheated on to saving someones life forgetting her completely and making my problems seem so small even there not,I was and still feel heart broken but more for a cute boy I don't even know really,later that evening my mom came home and I had to explain everything to her but I'm glad she understands "go and check on him one more time"my mom said I looked at her confused but walked up the stairs I opend my room softly looking inside it was dark but I dident see sam getting a bit nervous I walked to my bathroom opening it seeing sam laying on the ground both his arms open with a blate in his hand blood everywhere I rushed to him grabbing a towel wrapping it around his arms "MOMMMMM QUICK" I yelled crying I checked his pulse it was there but weak "im not letting you go not last time and not this time sam" I cryed my mom came running in "oh god" he took her phone calling 911 while she was talking she handed me another towel "press this on both arm very hard" she said im nodding pressing it on his arms hearing a quiet groan"colby"I heard a whisper almost not understandable "Sam please stay, stay with me please" "I don't want to die anymore"he said before his voice failed him" you won't you won't Sammy you are here with me"I cried "im so tired he whispered"he can't fall asleep or it's over"my mom whispered in my ear sounding very concerned"sam you have to stay awake if you want me to save you look at me please"I said tears running down My face I pressed harder on his arms he opend his eyes as good as he could" I'm sorry colby" no-no don't apologize okay we can do this I really really like you I mean it you saved me as well you know, you came in my life when I needed someone please stay in begging you if have to" I cried so hard at this point I could see anymore "y-you like me" he whispered "yes I do I really do I said kissing his forehead that's when I heard people downstairs" you get help now okay please stay with me I really need you I mean it "the paramedics came rushing in I explained what happend... Soon we where in the ambulance me holding his hand I refuse to let go" colby" I heart a small voice"yes Sammy"he smiled slightly "if I don't make it I want you to know that your my only good memorie in my life"my eyes water "Sammy you won't die okay we will make so much memories together if you hold on and fight okay"he looked at the paramedic who also had watery eyes "please tell anyone I don't want them to call my parents I don't want them there I mean it please tell anyone" he mumbled looking at him "okay I will" "he really mean it his parents are the reason he is here they kicked him out and treated him very bed you have to tell the stuff" he nodded 5 min later we come to the hospital it felt like an eternity they wheeled him out and run in the emergency room the nurses and doctors where waiting already I let go of his hand that was the worst feeling I ever felt in my life I just stood there in shock my body felt frozen" hello I'm nurse Tamara are you related to him Im colby brock im his *what do I say * boyfriend he came to me after he got beaten and kicked out from his parents I found him in the bathroom she nodded please take a seat a doc will come to you I nodded walking in the waiting room 10 min later I saw my mom running up to me"colby"she said sitting down I just threw myself in her arms I didn't "shhhh it's okay colby he will be okay"I'm so incredibly stupid I should of know not to leave him alone after I saved him 1 hour early "hey colby don't beat yourself up I'm sure you did anything you could I mean you saved a person and that 2 times you can be so proud of yourself I am for sure" she said I pulled away wiping my tears " btw mom he told me and the paramedics he don't want them to call his parents or want them here I just telling you in case you have to tell them again bc they all know you" alright baby I go and talk to the doctor and tell the nurses okay keep calm I'm right back yeah "she said I nodded not knowing how to stay calm in a situation like this I looked at my hands seeing Sam's blood all over them and my shirt if he dies now then this is 1000% my fault why did I do that why did I let him alone you are the most stupid person on this planet I will never ever forgive myself for this I stood up just walking back and forth I was dizzy like crazy but I couldn't just sit there I couldn't after an eternity my mom walked back and to me "is he okay please tell me he is okay" colby come let's sit down " no I don't want the whole sit down and then tell you bad news stuff tell me mom" hey breath baby okay he is still in operation but he is still here but the bad news is a nurse called his parents bc she dident knew and bc he's 17 "I looked at her shocked" "mom we can't let them get to sam I mean it" I said feeling me hyperventilating a bit " hey hey come here sit down they won't baby they saw all his brushes and injuries that healed over time they called the police when they get here the security will be there" I nodded calming down a bit " he had so many broken bones over the last years it's crazy they saw them all in X-rays this poor boy" I looked at her as teats running down my face "what are we doing when he gets out he can't go back mom" he can stay with us for a bit and then we have to see technically he comes to a Foster family until 18 but we talk about that later"he will be okay right" I whispered softly "physically probably mentally he definitely needs help" I know,I know I said looking up seeing the doctor walk to us I sit up straight looking at him my heart was pounding out off my chest "he lost a lot off blood 5 min more and he wouldn't be here you can go see him now" I just started crying the relief that washed over me "where what room" is the only think I said "3rd floor room 340" I nodded sprinting up and run to the elevator it opend and I pressed 3 after 30 sec it opend and run down the hall "336-338-340" I opend the door seeing sam in bed both arms in thick bandages I walked to his bedside pulling the chair to the bed sitting down "hey sam" I said taking his hand he slowly opend his eyes looking at me "colby?" yes Sammy I'm here "am I dead" I run my hand over his forehead "no you are not dead you are in hospital with me"I said sliding the hair out of his eyes"are you mad at me" he whispered " why would I be mad" bc I did that and in your bathroom you where there for me and I did that " hey don't apologize okay I was to stupid to see that it's a bad idea to leave you alone but sam I hope we understand us that you need help" he nodded but I only go if you come with I don't want to go alone "I go with you wherever you want me I told you I help you" that's when the door swung open 2 people walking in I dident know,it was definitely not a nurse or doc I looked at sam and he looked terrified "are these your your parents" I mumbled he nodded looking so scared I jumbled up pushing them both backwards with all the strength and anger I had inside off me closing the door behind me " you wont go anywhere near him ever again" says who his dad spat and pushed me " I said that I pushed him back making him hit the wall" nurse " I yelled only over my dead body will you ever come near him again" 2 nurses come running " these are Sam's parents we need security" I said looking them dead in the eyes one nurse run off pressing the botton they have in there room " he is our son and nobody can hold us back to see him" his mother said " oh I can amd I will he is my bf and I do anything for him" so you are his faged friend you both are disgusting " I looked him in to his eyes" the only one sick and disgusting is you for years you beat him break his bone and then kicked him out but this ends today and you will get what you both deserve " his father was about to hit me when 2 securities came and tracking them out" please hold on to them until the police is here " the nurse tells them they nod tracking them away they yell and spit on them I just turned around going back in the room seeing sam sitting up crying" sam-Sammy everything is okay you are save they are gone now " his breathing was so deep and fast I took his hand gently placing it over my heart" can you look at me please " he looked up his eyes looked so terrified it broke my heart" you are okay they won't come near you ever again " I don't want to go back - I don't want to go back he said over and over I pulled him in my arm holding him to my body" Sammy they won't I promise you on my life they won't you stay with me if you want to okay " I said looking at him" you still want me "of course I still want you nothing is your fault but you have to promise me to fight we can only win if we fight yeah" I looked at him he nodded looking in my eyes he looked down "talk to me Sammy tell me what's on your mind"..... "That sounds so stupid even in my head I wanted to die and also not when I was laying there I was so scared to die" "Sammy that doesn't sound stupid at all your just tiered and can't fight anymore but you also don't want to give up I understand that more then you think but never forget life always gets better don't give up yet your parents and the people in school doesn't matter at all later anymore and you will live how you want to and dream off I promise you it will get better, but I understand you fr I don't have any real relationships either only the ones who want something and relationships only using me as I told you yesterday I'm just not "cool, or special" I'm so sorry that happend to you I don't understand that at all your Character is so amazing you are so caring and sweet fuck who just wants people for fame or popularity that doesn't last anyway " I smiled at him thank you Sammy that is so sweet of you that means a lot" that's when the nurse walks in "mr brock you have to leave now for the night you can come back at 9" the nurse said "NO"sam said as I was about to get up I looked at him "I'm sorry mister golbach that's our hospital rules" the nurse then said "I don't care then I'm leaving now"..... mr golbach you have to stay here for a few days you lost a lot of blood "I dont care a single bit he either stays or I'm leaving and I can go whenever I want" he said my eyes going big *damn he is stobburn * the nurse walks out with a huff "I hope you know they will come back in 2 min with a doctor right" I chuckled yes I know and watch me I do what I want " he said making me smile for some reading
The nurse came back in with 2 doctor now mr golbach what seems the problem"I don't have any doctor the nurse told me colby has to go and I said no she said it's the rules and I said okay then I'm leaving bc that's my decision Mr golbach I have to ask to please think about that you almost died 3h ago it's dangerous to leave"I looked at him in worrie knowing the doctors are right"yes and I would appreciate you have a bit empathy for people who are very very struggling and need there comfort people I know that you don't make the rules I also accept them but at the moment I need colby"I looked at him my lips quivering I can feel it"doctor young could I talk to you for a quick second please" he nodded walking out "who is that"he mumbled unter his breath"that is my mom she is a nurse here"ohhhh he said"can I maybe get a hug I really need one if that's okay" making me smile you don't have to ask that sam you can hug me whenever you need okay"I said hugging him he laid his head in my shoulder I wrapped my arms tightly around him"everything will be okay you can do it, I know you can"I wispered in his ear I looked up seeing y mom walking in smiling at me" he can go"she mouths making me smile as well"hey Sammy"mhmm he hummed you still want to go home with me"yes - yes I do"he said in an instant"okay then let's go we can go home"he pulled away looking at me" really "I nodded"I convinced the doctors I take care at home but I have to treat your arm and if you get worse at any point I have to bring you back alright "my mom said" thank you so much he said shyly looking down "hey don't be embarrassed sam I see this and much worse everyday and colby really likes you so I'm sure you will be just fine"she said making my cheeks hot I stood up helping sam up his legs shook for a sec" you okay" yeah I was just dizzy for a sec he said smiling "help him to the car colby and walk slow his body is still fighting the lost blood" I wrapped my arm around his waste holding him in case he falls and we slowly walked out the room and to the elevator waiting "tell me when you wanne stop okay" he nodded as we walk in the elevator he moved down and the door opend "wait in the car I'm there in a sec my mom said holding her car keys out I nodded walking out with sam slowly we walk to her car it was pretty close to the entrance thank god I open the car letting him in and walk around getting in on the other side sitting down "are you okay physically" yeah just a bit weak " that's okay Sammy it will get better when did you eat the last time" I ask his face falls and he looked down making my heart drop "please tell me sam" 4 days ago he whispered making my heart hurt that's when my mom walked up to the car and got in "I got all your paperwork sam" thank you for helping me "no problem sam" she smiled "mom could we get some food before we go home please" I said looking at her through the mirror pointing my eyes to sam " she nodded of course we can what would you 2 like" what would you like Sammy " I'm not really hungry I looked up at the mirror seeing my mom look concerned I leaned to his ear" Sammy you promised me to fight right "he nodded slowly" so please eat something for us " okay he said playing with his fingernails I take his hand in mine and softly run my thumb over his hand seeing the corner off his mouth slightly raised up" so is there anything you love to eat " yes sandwiches he said great then let's find sandwiches I said" ohh 3 min away is an Arby's that's perfect " my mom said we drive to the drive in to order what would you like he looked at the board nr 9 please" he said softly but with a dr pepper I nodded my mom ordered now we wait " btw colby we have a blow up mattress so you can sleep in your room to i give it to you when where home" that's amazing thanks mom " we soon got our food and drove off, of course I couldn't resist and snacked on the fries" colby no food in the car you know that " my mom said" I don't eat anything I said with my mouth full making sam giggle it was the cutest sound I ever heard it made me so happy soon we where back home I got out walking around the car helping sam out his knees wobble a bit so I held him up we walked to the door mom opend it and we walked straight to the couch I set him down putting the bag on the table I got back to the door taking my shoes off "I go clean real quick" she whispered in my ear making me sadly nod I walked back to the couch sitting down taking out our sandwiches and drinks sam took his drink taking a few sips but he just steart at the food *I have to do something to distract him * "Sammy what was one think you love or loved to do I ask biting up on my sandwich" mhmm I loved going to abandoned places and as a kid to the Zoo I love animals you know "no way I love that to omg when you are better let's find an abandoned house I said seeing him taking his sandwiche smiling" and I like the Zoo bit I was always scared they think I'm a baby bc apparently you can only go as a kid I looked at him with a frown making him giggle softly " how about we go and then fuck what they think, bc I think that is cute and amazing he said taking another bite" my favorite animals are koalas but we probably won't find them only in Australia I laughed " yeah probably but there are so many cute animals and I loveeeee the aquarium" omg me to I smiled all the big and tiny fish and the water so blue it's so beautiful " he nodded smiling making me so happy that I can get his mind off" what was your first lost place you ever bin I ask "it was a super old creepy house in the middle of nowhere it was super old" ohhh that sounds cool where you all alone " he nodded wow your bad ass I chucked soon he finish eating" we have to find a place to go fr I wasn't at a lost place in so long " I know a place but I never got there bc it's in the woods behind a field and I was scared to go alone" that would be amazing I just hope you know how we get there bc I don't I laughed making him giggle I hope so if not we are lost in the woods he said "oh no I don't know how to make fire or hunt food" I made a shocked fake face he laughed what warmed my heart my mom walked down the stairs looking at me nodding slightly "hey how you 2 take a nap at least you are awake for way to long and neither of you need to argue with me I'm your mother and you both do what I say she smiled making me shook my head and Sam looked down smiling a bit" come we better go Or we get grounded I laughed he followed me up the stairs I walked in my room seeing sam tens a bit looking down"can I tell you something embarrassing"ask just to distract"of course " I go to my closet while he sits down I turn around with my stuffed koala" this is Manny and I still sleep with him" "awww omg he is so cute and that is not embarrassing at all I wished I had some"I looked to the ground seeing my mom had already put up the blow up mattress I sit down "you want him for a bit I don't need him every night" he looked at me" really I don't want to take him " hey I give it to you gladly if you like to sleep with him" he nodded okay I'm just going to the toilet you can lay down if you want I said walking in the bathroom closing the door looking around it all looked normal but the Picture before my eyes is not,I don't think I will ever forget, I did my business and washed my hands walking back out seeing sam lay on my bed looking uncomfortable somehow "are you okay sam is something wrong with the bed" I ask looking at him"no I just im" I walked to him sitting on ground in front of the bed "just what Sammy" I said softly "I dident sleep in a bed for 2 years" he said I almost couldn't comprehend what he's saying "not in a bed where did you sleep"on the ground in the basement where mentally ill people sleep that's what my parents said " I looked at him in disbelief my eyes water" this will Never happens again Sammy okay you sleep in my bed until I get a bigger one or a sec one, we also get you clothes " I said as a tear run down my cheeks I wiped it quickly"don't cry colby please I can't see people sad" I'm sorry this makes me just sad" I mumbled he set up and opend his arm we just hugged for a few min feeling so relaxed in his arms and at peace I leaned away rubbing my eyes "I'm sorry I just got overwhelmed" I said "colby don't apologize for your feeling the last few days had to be so hard for you to" I nodded "but let's try and sleep for a bit it will help us both" I laid his head down covering up I lay down to in the same direction as sam we just looked at each other without saying anything my koala is his arm he reached his hand out to me I take it just holding it running my thumb over it softly he closed his eyes slowly making me smile I closed mine as well holding Sam's hand tightly