Love Me [Jim Halpert]

Five

THE DUNDIES

"Tonight is the Dundies, the annual employee awards night here at Dunder Mifflin. And this is everybody's favorite day." Michael told the cameraman as he held up a plastic Dundies trophy. "Everybody looks forward to it. Because, you know, a lot of the people here don't get trophies very often. Like, Meredith or Kevin. I mean, who's gonna give Kevin an award, Dunkin' Donuts Plus, bonus, it's really, really funny. So I... You know, an employee will go home, and he'll tell his neighbor, 'Hey, did you get an award?' And the neighbor will say, 'No, man'. I mean, I slave all day. Nobody notices me. Next thing you know, an employee smells something terrible coming from the neighbor's house. Neighbor's hanged himself. Due to lack of recognition. So..." He glared into the camera.

~

With Michael's ramble over, out in the bullpen, Jim was at Pam's reception desk, "So you ready for the Dundies?" Jim asked, filling out a form.

Pam grimaced, "Ugh."

~

"You know what they say about a car wreck, where it's so awful, you can't look away? The Dundies are like a car wreck that, you wanna look away, but you have to stare at it because your boss is making you." Pam pursed her lips, sat in her interview.

~

Back in the present day, "Hey-hey-hey!" Michael deepened his voice. "It's Fat Halpert!" He perched himself on the reception desk beside the boy.

Jim looked from Michael then to the camera, "What?"

"Fat Halpert! Jim Halpert." Michael revealed the joke to the unamused staff. "So why don't I take you on a tour of past Dundie winners? We have Fat Jim Halpert here." He patted the man on the shoulder, leading him over to his desk. "Jim, why don't you show off your Dundies to the camera?"

"Oh, I can't because I keep them hidden. I don't wanna look at them and get cocky." Jim played with a pen.

"Oh! That's a good idea."

"Mine are at home, in a display case above my bed." Dwight chimed in.

"Yeeaacck!" Michael groaned, sticking his tongue out. "TMI. TMI, my friends."

~

"TMI? Too Much Information. Uh, it's just easier to say TMI. I used to say 'Don't go there,' but that's lame." Michael stated.

~

Back in the bullpen, "And here we have Stanley the Manley. Now, Stanley is a Dundie all-star." Michael bowed. "Aren't you, Stanley? Why don't you, uh, show them some of your bling?"

"I don't know where they are." Stanley looked at Michael blankly. "I think I threw them out."

"Oh, no, you di-in't."