Royal Misconception | HEEHOON

At last

“Listen, I know we talked about this and I know what I said… and I’m not saying I changed my mind, but… have you seen Beomgyu’s daughter?” Sunghoon had walked in on Yeonjun and Soobin talking. More accurately, he’d say, he walked in on Yeonjun complaining.

“I have, yes, she’s very adorable,” Soobin didn’t seem to be paying that much attention to Yeonjun, just enough to be able to follow the conversation.

“Isn’t she?” Yeonjun agreed enthusiastically. “Now imagine just how adorable our child would be, they’d be so cute everyone would love them,” Yeonjun did not look okay. Sunghoon thought he looked conflicted and tired. Not as tired as Soobin, but still.

“I know, they’d be the cutest,” Soobin agreed, but he sounded as monotonous as one could sound. “But we agreed we aren’t ready for kids yet,” Soobin reminded him.

“I’m not saying we should have a baby,” Yeonjun argued. “I’m just… thinking about how it would be, how they’d look…” Yeonjun trailed off. “It’s just…”

“Yeah?” Soobin prompted him, waiting for him to complete his thought.

“We are older than them,” Yeonjun started, “than Beomgyu and Taehyun.”

“Barely, so?” Soobin didn’t get his point.

“Than Sunghoon and Heeseung too,” he added. “My younger brother is having a child, and I just… it feels like I should be ready? How are they ready but I’m not? It’s not even that I don’t want children—” Yeonjun exhaled loudly in frustration. “I don’t even know what I’m trying to say.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” Soobin said softly. “But you know no one is hurrying us, right? We can take our time.”

“I do, I know, but…” Yeonjun failed to express how he was feeling.

“It’s like everyone is leaving you behind?” Sunghoon decided to make his presence noticed. This was a conversation he probably shouldn’t be a part of, but he wanted to help Yeonjun out of his own head.

“Yeah…” Yeonjun smiled sadly. “It seemed so easy for you and Beomgyu to decide —to know you wanted kids, and here I am…”

“It wasn’t, easy I mean,” Sunghoon confided in them. “And I actually freaked out when you had your pregnancy scare,” Sunghoon remembered how he’d been and now he really felt stupid. “Before coming here, I really thought my only option was to have kids, probably more than one and in a very short period of time.” Yeonjun had an idea of what Sunghoon’s beliefs had been, but he was still shocked. “If things had gone as planned, I had already accepted that would be my life at eighteen, I had years to get used to the idea and prepare myself.” Sunghoon wanted to be as honest as possible, even if that meant once again relating what he’d been taught. “I had always wanted kids; when I turned sixteen, I had fully accepted that I’d probably have my first child at eighteen and while I may not like the father I would sure as hell love my child. Things worked out better than I had expected, as you know, and so this feels natural.” Sunghoon placed a hand gently over his stomach, cradling the small bump. “But I had years behind that and a lack of choice. When you think your only option is to have kids, you get used to the idea a lot faster.”

“But you already knew you wanted kids—” Yeonjun tried to argue.

“I’ve known that since I was a kid,” Sunghoon remarked. “I was seven and already saying I wanted kids, but I obviously wasn’t ready then,” he mocked himself. “And if I had gotten pregnant at eighteen… or even back when I first got here… I can’t say for certain I would have been ready, but I had already accepted that as the only possibility.”