Always Been You | Just You Series

6. Falling in More Ways Than One

*~Kodi~*

I'm sitting in my room thinking about what Melody said. It makes me wonder if Sasha heard about the additional part of this rumor yet. If she did she probably feels like shit about it. She may be shy and always ready to hold her own but because of her traumatic past she always feels she needs to put herself before others and hates whenever she's become the problem or in the spotlight.

     I heard her voice going down the hall earlier, so I know she's home. I look at my phone for the time, then I see the picture of Sasha and me at the beach. Her hair is wild from the wind, she's on my back ruffling my hair, her smile is wide and full of pure bliss from laughing, and she's in a red bikini. I remember that day like it was yesterday, we spent the whole day surfing and laughing together. I've never surfed til that day and definitely failed multiple times but every time I fell she just smiled and shook her head then continued to help me, not caring that I was a screw up.

I close my eyes letting the memory sink in then stand up. I walk out of my room and start towards the end of the hall because Sash is the last door. I grab the doorknob and slowly open it. I feel the whole world shift....

Sasha is sitting on the ground in a ball with her knees pulled into her chest. She shakes down to the bone with each sob. Her eyes finally look up at me they're red and worn seeking help but unable to speak. Tears have stained her usual pink cheeks. Quickly putting it together I realize she must have heard about the additional part of this rumor.

I slam the door and lock it knowing she doesn't want anyone else to see her like this. I fall to the ground next to her. She continues to shake and lose every bit of strength left in her as a get closer to her. I grab her shoulders and pull her onto my chest hugging her and rubbing her back. She buries her face into my shoulder seeking coverage. She starts to sob harder into me finally losing it all.

I continue to rub her back, then a memory hits me like a bus. I'm taken back to 9th grade, I remember opening the door to Sasha's room, her on the ground, seeing her cheek bleeding from her father hitting her. She had a blade in her hand holding it to her ankle. I darted across her room kneeling next to her. I slowly took the blade from her hand and toss it across the room. I pulled her close to me while my heart was pounding threatening to burst through my chest. I started shaking with her not wanting to let go of her scared of what she might do if I did. She lifted her head slightly to look at me, tears streamed down her face. Then she explained how her father hit her again in great detail knowing it's probably engrained in her memory. I also remember her telling me how he called her worthless and that they only pretended to love her, just like the rumors that are going around....

Putting my arm under her and standing up holding her close I slowly sit on the bed and lay back. She wraps her arms around my neck and hides in my chest. I lay my cheek on the top of her head needing to be closer to her. I'm not letting her go I'm too scared of what she'll do.

"Sash do you want to tell me what's wrong? If not that's ok too, I promise I'm gonna force you too," I quaked out.
"Later," she mumbles into my shirt.
"Ok, bombshell."

We lay like this for another 20 minutes at least. I just hold her rubbing her back and playing with her hair trying to relieve my worry. Her shaking and loud sobs stopped but she's still not getting up.

     Then she lifts her head to look at me, most of the redness has left her eyes. She lifts up onto her arms and lays down beside me on her back rubbing her eyes. I immediately feel the distance between us, so I pull her head to my shoulder. We're used to being rather affectionate with each other but sometimes it just feels different in a way, like now.