Vent Book ➳☙

Writing

I love writing on Wattpad. But I feel so tiny compared to everyone else. I have read many amazing books with many amazing authors, and I'm literally feeling like compared to them all I'm just like another ant in the colony, while they're out thriving because of their hard work and it works that well for them. (or smh like that I'm tired rn ok idk what I'm saying) I know that probably most of them are struggling, but yet I can see amazing results. 

I'm often met with writers block and I have lots of different stories I don't even have a plot for. I just get an idea, write it down quickly, and then it disappears in the ocean of my "you gotta do this" list. Feels kinda pathetic tbh. 

I don't know a lot of expressions and other things in English since it is my second language and even though I'm fluent it's hard sometimes. I have a lot of puns saved where there are words you can use instead of the word "said" and I feel it's very helpful, and I also think my word bank and the way I've decided to write is because of that I've read a lot of amazing stories. 

It sounds wrong to myself when I say this but I'm honestly kind of jealous sometimes when I read a story since I didn't think about that maybe, or that they have the ability to use this word, or be able to write that paragraph. I know a lot of people that don't speak English but write in English have a lot more experience and knowledge then me, and they've learned it way back than I did, as I started to learn English probably like late 2020 and early 2021 when I switched to an English school in my country. 

I know I should appreciate the fact I got the hang of English quite early and that my English skills are far better than everyone in my  class, but I still compare myself sometimes, and I can't help it. 

I'm not gonna say anymore lol ;3