Frustration

Chapter 15

"Hey there Fubuki," Shu greets, emerging from the dark storage. "Sorry, I was helping Lain return the equipment. He usually leaves it lying around like a child, making me clean up after him."

Lain scowls slightly, stalking out behind Shu. That guy didn't need to know his habits.

Fubuki nods in understanding, then he notices something.

"Shu," Fubuki starts, eyes zeroing onto Shu's lips as his teacher stops in front of him.

Lain smirks, anticipating the confrontation.

"Something on my face?" Shu asks, noting the perplexed expression on Shu's face.

"Kinda, your skin's red." Fubuki stutters out, mind whirling, "... on your lips."

Shu definitely didn't have that when they were eating lunch. And it's not like mosquito bites ever happen there. And not to be suggestive but he was in a dark, cramped room with- Lain?! Fubuki's thoughts string together absurd theories which make his face flush. No, there's no way Shu's into someone that unruly. Lain definitely forced himself on him. But wait, so Shu's been kissed-

His thoughts startle to a halt when he blinks from Shu's slim hand waving in front of his face.

"Fubuki, you okay?" Shu questions, genuinely worried as Fubuki typically wasn't so unalert.

"Huh? Yeah, are you?" He returns.

"Mhm, I'd just accidentally bit my lip too hard. It's nothing," Shu smiles, comforting.

"Oh yeah, figures." Fubuki replies, god, he's such an idiot, of course Shu wasn't like that with Lain!

Lain's brows furrow.

The idiot of a protege had been so lost in thought he hadn't picked up on the light trail of pink on Shu's cheek.  Just fumbling around and accepting Shu's excuse. Urgh, why does Lain even care whether the pupil knows the true nature of their relationship.

A dark crevice of his consciousness supplies so Fubuki knows Shu is his. So Fubuki knows he can never attain that level of intimacy despite the years he has known Shu. So Shu can solely look at hi-

Lain stills. No, what the hell. He couldn't care less.

He just needs Shu's mentorship to develop his flare to heights unheard of before. That's it.

"Anyways, Fubuki, Lain, I'd like to begin today..."

And with that their lesson progressed.

...

"That's all for today, Lain you make sure to pay attention to your opponents form- Fubuki! Watch out!" Shu exclaims the end as while Fubuki was approaching where Shu stood with Lain, the spare weights were just by his foot.

"Huh?" Fubuki gasps, ankle twisting, his gaze falling as gravity seizes control of his body.

Shu has hurried over with brisk steps, hoping to cushion Fubuki's fall. Fortunately he was successful, most of his pupils' weight supported by Shu's front.

Shu felt a soft, familiar sensation of his lips, belatedly realising that Fubuki's lips had accidentally collided with his from the fall.

Fubuki in a daze from the unexpected contact, startles when he sees Shu's widened eyes and immediately pivots his weight back to create distance. His ankle screams in red, ugly protest causing him to wince. Shu acts fast, extracting his arm around Fubuki's torso to shift his weight to himself.

"I, um, I'm sorry- I didn't mean to-" Fubuki stutters in worry, breathless.

"No, it's fine. More importantly, are you okay?" Shu smiles, a smile of exhaustion, concern and anything but joy.

"Mhm," Fubuki hums, unsure.

Lain watched the interaction, his feet bolted in the floor, despite his urge to run. His mouth screwed to a frown despite the want to scream. His eyes zeroed on them two despite wishing to see everything but them.

Lain feels the same hideous and disconcerting feelings to possess and own and keep.

Then he sees Shu's red, warm eyes alight with care, and genuine fondness- and wonders, why doesn't Shu ever give him that look? They've kissed more times than he can count- then an epiphany hits him- has anyone ever looked at him like that? Like he was precious of their own volition?

He rips his mind out of those thoughts, teeth clenching his lips hard enough to draw blood. But Shu's too focused on his first student to notice and Lain storms out of the room, abrupt and rampant.

The other two flinch at the noise and Shu heaves a sigh, worried. All the signs all indicate the same taboo conclusion- Shu's not dense. But that's wrong, so wrong. And so, he continues to find excuses, piled upon excuses and excuses.

A fool's foundation built on hope.

"...Shu?" Fubuki says, to snap Shu out of his own head.

He hates it. How much Shu gives himself for Lain. Why him? Why now? When he finally reunited with Fubuki.

"Yeah, sorry. Lost in thought, let me guide you to my room; I have a first aid kit." Shu explains, slowly making his way over to the exit.

"I'm alright." Fubuki insists, he's so lame, he doesn't want Shu to think that- more than anything.

"What kind of mentor would I be to ignore my student's injury?"

Fubuki nods, though between the two of them Shu seems infinitely more tired.

...

They reach his room, Fubuki sitting on his padded chair whilst Shu kneels before him wrapping his foot to settle the ointment he already applied. The silence stretches, solemn as the look of Shu's face which makes Fubuki feel as though a ton of rocks are stuck in his throat.

"I hope Lain's okay..." Shu mumbles, under his breath and Fubuki's brow furrows.

'Look at me.' Fubuki yearns to demand.

"I liked the kiss."

A look of pure dumbfound graces Shu's serious features- a look Fubuki mirrors after he comprehends what left his mouth.

Dammit, so much for taking his crush to the grave.

"Fubuki, are you feeling sick?" Shu asks instead of taking him seriously , it irks Fubuki, is it so hard for Shu to see him as more than just a kid?

It wasn't a confession that was intended just something Fubuki reflexively blurted to gain Dhu's attention- to steal it from Lain.

Fubuki nods with resolve.

A troubled look dawns on Shu's pretty face as he ties the bandage. He heaves a heavy sigh.

What is he doing wrong? Why isn't he setting professional boundaries? Why is everything so messed up?

But instead of dumping that on Fubuki, he stands.

"Fubuki. Stay in this room for now, I'll join you later, I need to check on some reports." Shu states, already turning away from Fubuki (- from his feelings, Fubuki feels.), and heading towards the door without a reply.

Fubuki clenches his jaw, was this a mistake?

He turns to the desk, burrowing his hand into his arms.

Shu didn't join him later that night, but when Fubuki woke, he was covered in a blanket, his head on a pillow rather than his arms.

It made him feel worse somehow.

Was he like... Lain?

Taking advantage of Shu?