Their Terrified Mate

Chapter Nine

We're at the pack doctor for Silver Moon and I feel sick. Alpha James and Alpha Dennis are in the waiting room while Henry and I are in the small doctor's office.

At first the alphas insisted on coming with us, but I had to put my foot down on that. I can hardly control the anxiety that I feel about going to the doctor, I don't think I could handle two alphas in the room on top of that.

The doctor is inspecting Henry and I watch like a hawk as he presses his stethoscope against my son's skin. The doctor asks a few questions here and there and I try my best to answer as truthfully as I know how. But there are some things I don't know. Like our family history. I was young when my mother died and she didn't talk to me about medical stuff at that age. The doctor frown every time I answer a question about our living situation at the Dark Forrest pack.

When the doctor is done looking at Henry, he pauses and turns to me.

"Henry is small for his age, but not terribly malnourished," the doctor says and I can't help the relief that I feel before he turns on me with a frown. "You on the other hand," he says, "I'm amazed you've managed to live so long on so little food. You were still a growing boy when Henry was born, and it shows that you sacrificed your food for him. Your bones are weak, and you are far too short for the average man, even an omega."

"You need to eat more," the doctor says, "but you need to ease into food. If you eat too much, you'll become sick and you need to avoid rich foods like chocolate for a while. I also want you both to take a multivitamin every day."

The doctor keeps talking, and I swear I try to retain as much information as possible, but it's so much and so hard to keep paying attention. My relief over Henry's wellbeing primarily overshadows any concern that I have for my own health.

I kind of wish that Alpha James and Alpha Dennis were in the room with us, my wolf longs for them, knows that they would take care of us, but I can't trust them. It doesn't matter if I feel the deep ache of longing in my chest, I know better than to trust an alpha, much less two.

There's just too much that could go wrong, too many ways that they can hurt me.

"Is there a way that I can talk to you alone?" the doctor asks and I look at Henry unsurely.

"I can have one of the nurses watch your son," the doctor says, "but I have some more personal questions to ask you and they may not be appropriate for such a young pup."

"Okay," I agree and the doctor calls in one of the nurses, who takes Henry away with the promise of giving him stickers.

"When was the last time you went into heat?" the doctor asks.

"I don't remember," I say, "not too long after Henry was born." I know that's bad, that I should be concerned about not having a heat for so long, but I haven't lived in a place where I could afford that concern. In fact, it was always quite the opposite. When my heats stopped, I considered it a blessing from the moon goddess.

When I still had my heats, Cam would lock me in his bedroom and have his way with me the entire time, sometimes even inviting other high rank members of the pack to 'keep me company' whenever he would have to leave.

The doctor nods, "there's a good chance that's the result of your lack of food," he says, "once you start eating regularly they should come back, but if not, I'll want to do a check up to see if it is caused by anything else."

The doctor continues talking, even having me schedule a follow up for me and Henry, but I am still focused on what he said and the realization that even though food is now regularly available to me, I will have to starve myself in order to keep my heat from coming back. For my own safety, I can't let it come back.