a slave to freedom (Eren Yeager x OC female)

7

Adeline: hey

she stared at her phone after hitting send, she had texted him everyday, never getting a response. it's been 2 weeks now. he hasn't shown up to breakfast, lunch, or dinner, hasn't answered anyone's calls or texts. anyone who goes to his house he just tells to go away, says he isn't feeling well. an obvious lie.

Adeline: Eren, please talk to me

she sends another text, still no response. she locks her phone, tossing it on her bed. she sits at the edge of her bed for a few minutes before standing up, grabbing a jacket, her phone and heading downstairs. she puts her shoes on and heads out the door, getting into her car and driving off. 

she parks at the bottom of the hill, getting out and heading up to Mikasa's grave. she sits next to the stone in the ground, pulling her knees to her chest. "i know it's late," she looks at the stone with Mikasa's name engraved on it. "i wish so badly that things turned out different. he probably wouldn't be this way if you were still here," she buries her face into her arms that rested on top of her knees. "Eren isn't talking to me again. it's been 2 week. these past few months he hasn't gone more than a day. i don't know anymore, Mikasa," a tears drops onto the sleeve of her coat. "is it selfish of me to-," something taps her head, she looks up and turns around. "what's this doing here? Eren wouldn't have left it," she grabs hold of the red scarf that had been wrapped around the tree, the ends gently flapping in the breeze. "i did," a voice says from behind the tree. Eren..? her face flushing bright red at the sound of his voice. did he hear me?! neither of them spoke, both sitting in the silence. Adeline couldn't tell if he wasn't talking because he didn't want her there or if he was feeling just as surprised as she was at the other's presence. "Eren," Adeline starts, but stops just as suddenly. she doesn't say anything else, just buries her head back into her arms, her face just as hot as tears fell down her face. he didn't say anything to his name being called. she stands up, from the ground, dusting off her pants. "i'm sorry, i'll just go," she says, her voice cracking as she walked off. a part of her wished so badly that he'd stop her from leaving, ask her to stay. alast he did not. 

*** Eren's P.O.V ***

he stayed silent as he listened to her footsteps grow further away. once she was safely away he let out a choked breath. he wasn't expecting her to be here, especially not at this hour. she was never one to go out late. if she was outside it was on her rooftop. tears had been streaming down his face since she arrived, unable to speak out of fear she'd hear his broken voice. get up, dammit! go after her! don't let her walk off! but he couldn't bring himself to move. paralyzed by the emotions he was feeling plus her unexpected appearance. "i'm sorry, Mikasa. i'm so so so so sorry. it wasn't supposed to be like this," he says through strained breaths as he continues to cry. it was supposed to be me lying there, not you... he sat at the tree for another hour and a half, hating himself more and more as he sat there. it's all my fault...

it's all my fault

it's all my fault

it's all my fault

why can't you just die...

once he had run out of tears, he leaned against the tree. his head pounding from crying for so long. "i hope you never forgive me," he says standing up, placing a hand on the scarf before walking away. 

he flops onto his bed, resting his arm over his eyes, recalling the night. he punches his bed, hating every moment. he ran his fingers through his hair, replaying everything over and over and over in his head. he lets out a loud grunt, frustratedly running his hands down his face, stopping over his mouth. despite feeling so weighed down, he felt a little bit lighter. before he realized it, he was dozing off. 

"Eren," a girl calls out. he shuffles a bit. "Eren!" he shoots up. he finds himself laying in grass, the sun out and bright. he shields his eyes for a moment, allowing his eyes to adjust. he looks around to see where he's at, he looks at the tree behind him, the scarf wrapped around it. "Eren," she says again, he turns around. "Mikasa...," he says, tears immediately filling his eyes, scrambling to his feet. "how are you, Eren?" he smiles gently at him. he pulls her into a hug, holding her tight. "Mikasa, i'm so sorry! i didn't want you to... i didn't for you," he sobbed into her. she wrapped her arms around him, "it's okay, Eren. i'm okay,"  she reassures, his crying becoming harder. she rubs his back as he continues to cry. "i have to go now. i'm always watching over you, Eren. so take care of yourself. and stop shutting Adeline and Armin out," she says. "please don't go," he says. 

his eyes flutter open, his face wet and vision blurry from tears. "Mikasa," he whispers, holding his hand out to the ceiling. he stays there for a moment, thinking about the dream he just had. it felt too real. he grabs his phone, seeing a text from Adeline. it's 16:37 (4:37pm)

Adeline: good afternoon. i hope you slept well

Eren: i did, thank you. how did you sleep?

*** Adeline's P.O.V ***

her phone went off, she paused her show, putting down her ramen and picking it up. surprised to see his name come up, she stares at it for a moment before responding.

Adeline: i slept okay. i wasn't expecting you to respond...

Eren: i know. i'm sorry i've been a piece of shit. can we talk tonight? 

Adeline stares at her phone, unsure if she wants to see him right now. he always does this. ignores me and then asks to have a talk. why do we always have to talk. why can't he just be here and not leave.

Adeline: sure, i guess

Eren: i'll be there in an hour

Adeline: okay

she sets her phone back down, finishing the episode she was on. cleaning out her dishes, her doorbell rings. she dries off her hands and opens the door to see Eren standing there. she walks away without a word, leaving the door open for him. she finishes up her dishes, he leans against the wall to the entrance way to the kitchen, watching her, not saying a word. she walks past him, glancing up at him before heading up to her room. he lowers his head with a sigh, following her to the bedroom. he finds her sitting on her rooftop, window open. he climbs through and sits next to her. silence taking over once more. "i thought you wanted to talk," she finally speaks, "so talk." he fidgets with his fingers briefly, "i'm sorry i keep ignoring you," he starts. "but you still do it," she retorts. he nods in agreement, "i know," he replies in disappointment. "i just.. i'm scared," he takes in a deep breath. she looks at him, confusion filling up her expression. "scared of what?" she asks, staring at him with curiosity. his cheeks start to turn a light shade of pink. it takes him a moment before he responds, "losing you," he admits. his words immediately making her face flush over. "losing me?" she repeats, "and Armin," he adds. she nods, "i'm going to be honest, Eren. if you keep pushing us away like this... you just might," she says, looking down at her hands that laid in her lap. "i know," he says. "if you know then why do it?" she asks, feeling a bit angry but trying her best to contain it. "i don't know what to do. i don't want to hurt you or lose you but i don't want to get too close, either," he says, looking up at the night sky. she doesn't respond, still staring at her hands that were now clenched together. she takes in a deep breath.

"what will you do then?" she questions.

he shrugs, "i don't know."

"i don't want you pushing me away, Eren. you may be scared of hurting me but i'm not. i'm scared of losing you. i don't know about Armin but i don't know what i'd do if i lost you," she looks at him, he stares back. "i don't want you to keep me at arms length, Eren. i hate it. i miss how we used to be. we were so close and then one day you decided you were going to push me away? how is that fair to me?" she says, a few drops of tears falling from her eyes. his gaze softened at her, placing a hand on her cheek to wipe the tears. "i don't want to either," he says, looking at every inch of her face before landing back to her eyes. "then why do it? if you don't want to, then stop. i want you close. i need you close," she says. her heart pounding at the sight of him. he leaned closer to her, slowly closing the gap between them. "please, Eren. keep me close," she whispers, his lips merely centimeters from her's. their lips brush against each other. he sighs, backing away, dropping his hand from her face. her heart felt like it was going to explode. "i promise i won't push you away again, Adeline Diericht," he says, grabbing her hand, looking away from her lips to her eyes.