The Hope beneath the Dark - Sebastian Sallow

*8. The heat of July

Sixth year ended about a month ago now, and after the rocky first two days of summer, it has since been uneventful, which I was thankful for. I desperately needed some calm in my life after everything I dealt with.

Today was my birthday, and even though it made me a bit sad that I wouldn't be seeing any friends for the occasion, or even be able to hear from them, I was grateful to spend it at home. My grandmother baked me a spiced root cake, my favorite one. It was also my mom's favorite. What made it even more special was that I get to eat it only once a year on my birthday. Before my mom died, my grandmother used to bake one twice a year, for both our birthdays. Mine on July 19th, and my mom's on May 18th.

My grandmother never celebrated her birthday, which was on February 5th, at least not since before I was born. When I was 4 or 5 years old, I asked my mom about it, and she simply said that she stopped celebrating it after the death of my grandfather, whom I never met as he died way before I was born.

Even though I wasn't expecting any owls, I somehow wished I would receive a letter from some of my friends. I was quite eager to hear back from Ominis, following up and my last letter to him about the Forsythe family. Although, I could feel it was a good thing that I was forced to wait until September. I had a hard time taking time to pause by myself, so most of the time, I would only get a break if the circumstances forced me to take one.

To be completely honest, what... well more like who, occupied my mind the most today was Sebastian. I didn't think he would've come to say goodbye at the train station anyway as Ominis and Freddie would've been there with me, had I not missed it, but I felt weird about our last conversation.

Of course, I haven't forgotten about that steamy kiss down in the Undercroft, but our last moment together was in the Great Hall, when he mentioned his summer plans with Imelda. I could've questioned her more about it when I came across her in Marunweem, but back then, I was too preoccupied and confused by what happened. Now that I think about it, she never mentioned anything either, which was kind of odd. Was it just because she didn't feel the need to tell me more, or was she avoiding the subject on purpose? I admit that it made me a bit anxious that the two of them may spend a lot of time together this summer. I heard a few rumours throughout the year about Imelda crushing on Sebastian at some point, and him and I were nothing more than friends, if we were even still friends at all. Let's say there were a lot of mixed feelings on both sides. Not that it pleased me to assume what he may think, but the hot and cold attitude he got with me the last few weeks at Hogwarts indicated that he was just as confused as me.

Seeing me kissing Freddie seemed to have made him furious, which we could say is not fair, but in complete honesty, the idea of him kissing another girl would've had the same effect on me, if not even worse. Freddie and I kissed twice, which I think Sebastian didn't know. I didn't intend to tell him, it was technically not his business, and I would only risk frustrating him, which I wished to avoid if we had a chance to fix our friendship.

All these thoughts danced around in my head as I sat at the kitchen table, waiting for my grandmother to come back with our plates of mashed potatoes with gravy, sausages and roasted Brussel sprouts. The two of us ate together, while she asked me about what I was expecting from this new year to come. She told me about what it represents, according to her, to turn 18 years old, that I wasn't a girl anymore, but a woman, or soon-to-be one, once I'll be graduating from school.

I wondered when the birthdays of some of my friends were... We never celebrated any birthdays last year, at least not that I was aware of. I must admit that I was new to them, and it took me a little while to get close to them, so all the birthdays must have gone unnoticed, for me anyway.

"Happy anniversary, my lovely dear!" My grandmother chanted, while placing the cake in front of me, with one candle in the middle.

I blew out the candle, not making any wish this year. I didn't know what to expect at all and I decided I'd just trust what life has planned for me.