Felicity Reviews

Review by Clair: Saving Michael📗

Reviewer: Clair (Maggie-Nary)

Requester: Saving Michael by KalliopeAdair

First of all, I want to apologize again for not being able to read all the available chapters. I actually fear I may not be able to make sense of everything if I forced myself to finish it entirely. Still, I think I've already read enough chapters to make a sensible review, as well as to talk about the reader engagement for your special request.

Secondly, I would like to note on this review that I don't include the book cover in my reviews, though it is one of the criteria we have to look at. Therefore, the cover will also not be included for the over all score to be fair.

Now, let's proceed.

Title: 4.8/5

I have no problem with the title entirely, only that I have seen it already to some stories before, though the name was not Michael and the wording was a bit different.

Summary/Blurb: 4/5

The truth is, I'm not really sure how am I supposed to rate this one because of some reasons. One of the reasons is that, the blurb didn't really seem so new to me. You know, it felt like something that I've read a thousand times, though that's just an exaggeration. However, I think since romance is the most popular genre, what else in it can we not consider to be cliche?

Maybe I'm just being too picky, but somehow I want to expect something more than the usual Ms. melodramatic meets Mr. lonely. Clearly, that's the only thing shown in the blurb, which could be improved if you spice it up a bit with some ideas from subplots. That's what I'll be talking about later in a different area.

Grammar and Punctuation: 3/5

Well, this is one of the areas where I'll be a bit technical, but nothing's too serious.

First, I did not notice any serious mistakes when it comes to your grammar, so that's not what I'll focus on. Most of the problems I found were in your dialogue punctuation. Before we deal with that, let's take a look on this one here first:

Will, stepped forward, his hand outstretched, 'It's lovely to meet you, Emma, my real name is Fitzwilliam but that's far too stuffy for me so friends call me Will,' his voice was smooth and clear, like melted chocolate and there was a twinkle in his eye now that hadn't been there earlier when she'd first seen him, courtesy of a certain blonde stood to the right of her.

Before the dialogue, the first error we have there is the comma splice. We do not use commas to separate two independent clauses, so if we will try to fix it, it may look like this:

Will stepped forward with his hand outstretched. 'It's lovely to meet you, Emma. My real name is Fitzwilliam but that's far too stuffy for me so friends call me Will.' His voice was smooth and clear like melted chocolate, and there was a twinkle in his eye now. That hadn't been there earlier when she'd first seen him, courtesy of a certain blonde stood on her right.

I think this line just gives some idea of what am I going to tackle on this area as I continue. Now, I'll start with the dialogue punctuation.

'It's nice to meet you too, Will.' Emma replied.

This should be:

'It's nice to meet you too, Will,' Emma replied.

Another example:

'Here we are.' the receptionist sauntered over, clearly in no hurry and unceremoniously added another set of papers onto the pile Emma already held in her hands.