Detroit: Become Human - Connor RK800 One Shots

#18 Journal [REQUEST]

Note: This was actually intended to be a much longer au, with far more details and lore-building but unfortunately I only have a few snippets that didn't quite grapple the requester's genius to its full potential. It was a beautiful but ambitious concept and I was ambitious enough to take it on, only to fall short, like I do. @Safa_Seo , this one's dedicated to you <3

SNIPPET #1 Bathroom Floor

"Every time I was with him it was like another hit of chaos. You had to be pretty blind to love an addict, huh. I'll admit to my stupidity but I can't help but be so... infuriated by what he did. By what he thought was right when he was high on the horrible stuff. He made me like- like this. This thing that's only partially human. Look at me, I'm not normal." She left a lingering pause, thinking back to only a few minutes ago when she showed her 'party trick' to Gavin. She continued, this train of thought wouldn't leave her and she had bottled this up for far too long. She had opened a vent inside of herself, and that air circulating was now fully exposed and free to escape.

"I hate him, I hate him. I remember every single day that he did this. He was the one who caused that crash. He was the one who recklessly killed himself. He was the one who made my best friend need a mechanical spine for fuck's sake! He was the one who took my undisturbed, human eyes away from me! He was also the one who forced me to accept living with this thing!" (Y/N) shoots her right hand up from the floor, holding it in a right angled position. To Connor's surprise, the skin on her arm began to fade and peel back to reveal a pristine white plastic prosthetic. His LED spun yellow, trying to figure out what just occurred. She wasn't completely... human?

"You're..." Connor started, but couldn't quite bring himself to finish the sentence.

"Part android, a cyborg if you will, a freak. This is why I don't like showing people Connor, because this is the traumatic experience I have to relive and remind myself of every single fucking day." She tossed the attached prosthetic arm around in front of her, as if she was looking for an answer to a question that she hadn't even asked. Connor shifted his spot on the floor, bum shuffling his way towards her. He presented a faint smile on his face and reached his right hand out towards her, peeling back the synthetic skin that masked the plastic underneath. His fingers merely caressed the inside of her wrist, ghosting it ever so slightly. She pulled back out of shock, explaining a defensive expression clear on her complexion.

"I- I can't. You- you'll see things you won't like Connor. It's a deep, dark world in there and I don't want you to go through everything I went through in a matter of seconds. I have to protect you, I can't let you get hurt like I did." She respired in a deep manner, exaggerating every breath to calm herself.

"But I can't let you bottle all these emotions up inside of you, eventually it will tear you apart (Y/N). I want to help you through this. You're not alone." His pure white arm didn't move a millimetre as he waited for her response.

It didn't bother either of them that their deepest, most personal conversation was shared on the bathroom floor of a colleague's home.

"I know." Her arm moved back towards his, apprehensively. She didn't go much further to touch him, she couldn't force herself to. Connor gave her a reassuring smile and gripped her forearm lightly. She held him in return as memories were transferred and copied from cloud to data storage. She could see how much Connor's face distorted and changed as the memories flooded past him but he still kept a steady hold on her; progressively getting tighter as more anxious, distressing moments were risen from the depths.

Now he would know everything, yet that had no effect on her. She trusted Connor, he knew that he was there for her, even through the worst of the worst.