Everything I Wanted // Billie Eilish

Please stay

I felt my eyes slowly flutter open as the sunlight peeked through the curtains. That was the first time I've slept through the night before. Other than waking up once, I usually wake up a lot more. There was something about Ava being here that made me feel more comfortable. It actually felt for once that someone really cared about me. She cared about me enough to comfort me whenever I needed it. She wasn't mad I had woken her up in the middle of the night, but instead she cared for me and soothed me back to sleep.

As much as I didn't want to, I couldn't help but catch feelings for her. She was beautiful, and she was the sweetest person I've ever met. Maybe I would try for her. Maybe I would try to let myself heal, for her. I didn't want to hurt her, I didn't want to see her break, because of me. Maybe she could help me heal, maybe all it took was her, to help relief me of these dark negative feelings. 

I know I wanted to stay with her, I didn't want to leave her side. There was something about her that just pulled me closer whenever I felt like I should push her away. I'm not sure if this is what this feeling was, but I think I loved her.

I looked up slowly staring up at her face. We were still cuddling, her arms was wrapped around my me with our legs intertwined. I felt her warm breathing against my forehead. As I watched her sleeping, I took in ever feature on her face. Since I was this close, i could see ever freckle dotted around her nose and cheeks. I love the way her lips were slightly parted and gave off a small shimmer in the sunlight. Her eyelids were closed and I could see her perfect lashes resting on the tops of her cheeks. Not to mention the really cute bed hair she had right now. It was still wavy, but it was now messy and spread over her forehead from laying down.

I lifted my hand and softly pressed it on her cheek. I then put my finger to her lips and felt the softness of them. I had a thought in my mind that I've never considered before. If I asked her, would she say yes of I asked her to be my girlfriend? I know we only met yesturday, but so much has happened since then. I feel like I've known her forever, but I felt a strange deep love for her. 

I did something risky and removed my finger from her lips. I tilted my head towards her and placed my lips softly on hers. I hummed at the feeling of them against mine. She tasted sweet, that thought made me blush. I pulled away from them and stared at her. I wish her eyes would open so I could see her beautiful green eyes.

"Good morning Billie..." My face blushed a bright red as she slowly opened her eyes. "I-Im sorry I-I didn't know you were awake!" I watched as she cutely giggled, while bringing her hand up to cup my face. "It's fine Billie, it was cute." She pulled my face closer and kissed me gently on the lips. She moved her lips against mine making the kiss feel more intimate.

She pulled us apart and smiled at me with half lidded eyes. I felt as she went to sit up, but I quickly pulled her back down. "Don't leave! You're warm.." she laughed at my sudden reaction and rolled her eyes. "But I should probably start getting my stuff together, people are gonna wonder where I am." I gave her a sad look and held her tightly. "Please stay..." 

I watched her face expression soften and a small exhale left her lips. "okay... I just don't want anyone thinking I was kidnapped or somthing. My phone died last night so I didn't get to tell anyone where I am." I nodded and leaned over, handing her a cord from my nightstand. "Here." She took the cord and plugged her phone into it. "Thanks." She smiled and went back to cuddling me.

I had a thought pop back in my mind and wondered what her answer would be. What if asked her and she got all weirded out and didn't want to. I didn't want to to rush things, I didn't want her to think any different of me. I thought for a moment and realized this was just me overthinking everything. I pushed all irrational fears down and looked up at her.